


My Love Has Concrete Feet

by baileyrhapsody



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alpha Kara Danvers, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Earth, Alternate Universe, Attempted Sexual Assault, Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Gore, Omega Alex Danvers, Typical issues that come from ABO fics
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-10
Updated: 2020-02-01
Packaged: 2020-08-14 03:16:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 34,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20185360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baileyrhapsody/pseuds/baileyrhapsody
Summary: Kara does her best to make sense of the world around her. Alex is just along for the ride.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Story Title from Heavy in Your Arms by Florence + The Machine. This story is set on an Alternate Earth. This has been such a fun concept for me to explore. Shout out to the homie costia_gray for listening to me ramble about it like a lunatic.

AN: An Introduction, mostly.

**xxx**

At night, Kara dreams of Krypton.

Of the stillness in the depths of Argo City; of warped politics and fixed brigades. Guilds serving an alleged common purpose, a society content on damning itself. Rigid in outdated beliefs, stringent rules.

Memories bleed into one another. Flickers of dimming street corners, run down centers housing those no longer blessed by Rao’s light. And then red stones turned over, pavements bubbling with heat, screams rattling in her ears. The frazzled rambling of her mother, a thickness in her throat, apologies wrested from her father’s tongue. The guilty blues of Lara and Jor-El. Tiny Kal, a family estranged. Cramped space, a vast open empty existence.

Kara, displaced heir to the House of El.

Guildless, young, alone, afraid.

And then…

**x **

...and suddenly ‘Only Child Alex Danvers’ is no more and Alex, sleek with moss, slips into the role of ‘Big Sister’. Alex finds the title odd given the little she does know about Kara. They’re 16 and 17 respectively but trapped in the phantom realm for 24 years would mean that her foster sister is technically older than her.

Technically.

But Eliza and Jeremiah don’t seem to care about technicalities and plop Kara into the neat little box of ‘younger sibling’ without so much of a question towards the girl. No one ever stops to ask Kara what she wants, but Kara takes to the name with a subtle apathy that even Alex can appreciate. Blue eyes barely flicker as forged documents are shoved in Jeremiah’s hands from the Man of Steel himself. 

It’s not long before the entire town knows of the ‘foreign’ girl who takes up residence in the Danvers household. Conversations with friends are soon sidelined to revolve around Kara. What it’s like to have a stranger living in her home, eating her food, sharing her space? A couple of people have made mention of Kara’s appearance, referencing her beauty from the brief trips she’s made in the market or the town square. Discomfort twists in Alex’s stomach at every passing comment.

Her orbit starts and ends with Kara. Kara’s needs, Kara’s grief. There’s no reprieve from it. Alex fades into the background of her own life until she’s an outline in the frame of a photo. It’s irritating. It’s _humiliating_. The worst part is that it’s not even Kara’s fault. Alex wishes she could be angry but she can’t find it in her to take issue with Kara herself. Not when Kara is mostly quiet. Withdrawn, introspective. Detached.

Weeks passed with no change. They share a room but Kara spends most of the day out of it. At night Kara sits huddled up on the roof and watches the stars with an expression that borders misery. It’s the most emotion she ever sees from the other girl. Sympathy crawls up her throat at the sight of it. Alex starts to wonder then how she would handle losing her parents, her friends. Everything she could have had, could have been. An entire world of possibilities, gone.

The thought makes her ill.

It’s enough of a reason to at least try for courtesy.

**x**

Alex takes to observing Kara with narrowed eyes, carefully cataloging perceived likes and dislikes with a focus usually reserved for longstanding projects. Kara passes over her parents scientific journals and notebooks in disinterest, fills out math problems in seconds with a vague distaste that aligns with the behavior of someone from an advanced race. Nothing seems to capture Kara’s attention for long. There’s a minute interest in astrology before that too dissipates like a fine dust. 

Frustrated with the lack of progress, Alex finds herself clicking through various channels before dropping the remote. Kara had skimmed over episodes of Alex’s favorite shows with a thoughtful expression but gives nothing away. Alex sighs as she picks up her phone to respond to a text from Vicki. There’s a quiet intake of air that comes from the girl beside her. Alex looks over at Kara before glancing at the TV.

_Animal Planet_ plays in the foreground, a documentary on lions that she’s seen half a dozen times already. Fascination lights up in spirals of blue as awe briefly veils the intensity of how Kara wears her sorrow.

Alex hums at the reaction before bowing her head.

**x**

"I'm going to the zoo,” Alex states one morning, voice layered with hesitation. She tugs nervously at the end of her sleeve as she gazes up at Kara from beneath her lashes. “Do you- I mean, there’s a new exhibit opening up. You could come." Alex shrugs a little at that last bit, hoping Kara doesn't comment on the nervous fluttering of her heart, the anxiety that’s surely draping her scent.

Head tilting, Kara regards her silently for a moment. Her gaze flickers and shifts and Alex shuffles restlessly in place. She opens her mouth to say ‘Nevermind, it’s stupid, you don’t have to go’ anything, _ anything _to help stop the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach before Kara finally answers with a clear “Yeah” expression easing, furrow to pale brows thinning out. "Yeah, I’d like that."

Relief spills over Alex like a wave and she finds herself giving a jerky nod in response. 

At the exhibit, Kara places a shaky palm on indistinct glass and Alex looks on with a fuzzy sort of happiness as a smile lifts up the corners of Kara’s mouth. She inches closer, their shoulders not quite touching and watches Kara watch black birds spread their wings. 

**x**

Kara suffers from sensory overload. She had explained it once, halting and staggered, face pinched together in unease. The pain can be unbearable at times. The influx of sounds are like nails constantly drilled into the base of her skull. The air is polluted, festering, full of rot. Her eyes hurt from the artificial lights. 

She experiences everything, all at once, always. Kara’s control strengthens with time until she grows taut with it. Reserved in every thing she does, careful of how she moves in the world. Mostly keeps her hands to herself, mindful of how even steel could crumble at her touch. These reservations extend to Alex before falling away like all things do between them.

It starts with a hand on her shoulder, a ruffling of hair, the smoothing of furrowed brows. Lazy Sunday mornings, quiet afternoons spent in. 

At night Kara traces Kryptonian iconography into Alex’s skin, blue eyes enraptured and aglow with interest as Alex softens for her.

Countless trial and error.

Over time Kara learns that her hands can do more than bend and break the world around her. 

“I love your body.” Kara confesses to her one morning, jolting Alex out of her drowsy state. Pale cheeks go aflame as Alex stares at Kara in wide eyed bewilderment. “You’re just,” Kara continues with a sigh, dark eyes sweeping over her attentively, “So soft, Alex, everywhere.” 

The awe in Kara’s voice, so similar to how she sounded when they were at the zoo, makes Alex’s chest hurt. 

Kara rambles on, “You remind me of the good parts of home. Things don’t hurt as much when I’m with you.” Kara peers up at Alex then before her eyes lower, “Is that..is that weird to say?” she hesitantly asks, touch faltering.

Flustered, Alex flattens herself against Kara’s front in lieu of an answer, nosing along Kara’s neck self-consciously. Embarrassed but pleased by the knowledge that she makes Kara as happy as Kara makes her.

Alex tugs purposefully at Kara’s arm, smiling at the small huff of laughter Kara releases before she’s wrapped up in a solid embrace.

**x**

“The class system humans have in place is beyond appalling, Alex,” Kara mentions, voice low, face screwed up in disgust. They’re halfway through an episode of _Gossip Girl_, possibly one of the worst offenders, when Kara says it. “All day long I have to hear these so called alpha’s growl and pant vile rhetoric, completely aware of how their behavior upsets the omegas but uncaring, no, _thriving_ on it. It's disgusting.” 

  
Alex hums in acknowledgement, enjoying the comfort and pressure of Kara’s arm around her from beneath the blanket. The strength behind her foster sisters lithe frame, how Kara's arms marginally tighten around her the more animated she gets. Alex snuggles further into Kara's side as her shoulder lifts in a half shrug. “It is what it is, Kar. The system sucks, but there are people fighting to change it.” She tugs at Kara’s ear and gives a wry smile as dark blue eyes flicker towards her. “I’m going to be one of those people too, you know?”

Frowning, Kara holds her gaze for several long seconds before breaking it by drawing her closer. “I just hate the idea of anyone treating you like less than you deserve, Alex,” she murmurs into Alex’s hair. “I want you to be safe.”

Warmth settles low in Alex’s belly at that, makes her want to reach out and pull Kara on top of her. Be held down and protected and wrapped up in Kara's scent. The thought comes fast, hits hard, but flutters out almost as quickly. Alex bares her teeth playfully in response, “I’d bite it off before any of them could try it.”

Kara eyes her warily the rest of the night but it’s worth it for the initial shock of laughter that bounds from her foster sisters chest. 

**x**

“So what exactly is Kara’s deal, Alex?”

Alex startles at the question, a hint of panic momentarily shading her eyes. She looks up to catch her friends staring at her with a shrewd eagerness that makes her nervous. It's phrased oddly but she knows what they want. She shifts her gaze. Alex knows that nothing good could come from their curiosity yet answers anyway. “I think she's an alpha," she replies in a steady voice before pausing. Is she though? Now that Alex takes a moment to consider it, she's actually not sure.

Kara doesn’t display any of the other common traits of an alpha. Well, common traits associated with _ human _ alpha’s, that is. Kara’s scent is the only thing that makes her read as such. Did Kryptonians even experience the same mating cycles as humans? Alex isn't sure. She thinks about Clark and how his scent had comforted her when she was younger, though not _ quite _the same way it would have had he been a human omega. Does he go through estrus too? She wishes she had thought to ask, but the topic had never come up. Will Kara go through rut? Alex bites her lip at the idea. 

A murmur goes around the table. Jensen, a tall, burly alpha Alex personally cannot stand, snorts loudly from where he’s seated. An unsubtle glee sparks in his vision as he crosses his arms. “You _ think_, eh?” he drawls, chuckling heartily as Cameron, another alpha, elbows his side. Stephanie, the only other omega girl in their group, whistles low as Veronica, a beta, smirks beside her. Alex looks around, unsure how to process their reactions. It’s only when she notices Vicki, her alpha best friend, eyeing her dubiously that Alex starts to tense. 

“You're living with an unmarked alpha and your parents are okay with you two sharing a room?” Vicki asks, skepticism darkening her gaze.

Alex hears the implication loud and clear. Humiliation and anger burn a path in her chest. Alex’s hand tightens on her fork, mouth turning down unhappily. Of course, of _ course _ their minds would jump straight to that. Alpha’s and omega’s can’t coexist without the compulsion to _ mate, knot, breed _ruining any semblance of friendship before it can start. 

Sighing, Alex sets her fork down and straightens with authority. “Kara is my sister,” she starts slowly. “Blood related or not, we’re more than our natures. All of us are.” She meets their gazes one by one, daring any of them to deny it. "And I don't know about you guys, but I'd like to be seen as more than just a stereotype."

Vicki and Cameron have the decency to look guilty, knowing how delicate a subject it can be, but Jensen only rolls his eyes in response. “Yeah, yeah, Danvers, we get it with the SJW shit.” Jensen sniffs before turning to Cameron with a grin.“You see that movie last night, Cam?”

Topic dropped. Subject changed.

Alex frowns down at her plate as she tries to understand the heat curling in her stomach that involuntarily spreads at the thought of anything involving her and Kara

**x**

“My mother and father and I were Guildless, for a time.” Alex looks up from her textbook in surprise, glancing over at her foster sister with furrowed brows. Kara lays flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling with a disinterest that reminds Alex of Kara’s first months on Earth. 

It had been a particularly rough couple of days. Kara’s control had slipped, only for a moment, but the influx of well, _ everything, _had been enough to incapacitate her. Kara had ended up slumped over in the middle of town square, panic attack in full motion. Alex had been miles away, surfing with Vicki and a few boys from school. She hadn’t heard about it until later that day, when one of her friends had mentioned in passing that some of their classmates had seen her foster sister freak out earlier and, well... Kara had disappeared after that and the blame had then been shifted to Alex.

_ What had Kara been doing alone? Why weren’t you there with her, for her? How could you let this happen, Alexandra? _

The same mantra, different day.

Now they were both grounded. Kara for disappearing, Alex for not being a good enough sister, because she was never good enough in her parents eyes. Her worry wars with her feelings of failure until the worry wins out completely.

Setting her pen down, Alex pushes out of her seat and ambles over to Kara’s side of the room. She plops down on the bed next to her, curls into her side but doesn’t touch. Alex patiently waits for Kara to gather her thoughts. Kara doesn’t often speak about her life before Earth. 

“My aunt Astra had come to my mother one day and spoke of Kyrpton’s inevitable destruction.” Kara’s voice is tight, restrained. “The core was unstable. We had mined it for its resources to the point where it was no longer able to sustain itself. My mother was dismissive of my aunt’s concerns at first. They fought. My aunt left. I didn’t see her again for days.” Kara pauses then, inhales shakily as she attempts to collect herself. “I don’t know what happened exactly but my mother must have believed my aunt eventually. She went to my father and convinced him of the same. They spoke to the Council but...but it was too late.”

Alex reaches out then, eases forward into Kara’s frame and settles a palm on her stomach. Kara visibly shudders and covers Alex’s hand with her own, squeezing lightly. Kara sniffles and continues, “My uncle Non had murdered a guard. The Council believed my parents to have conspired with them, or at least had knowledge of the matter. When my father had gone to my Uncle Jor-El to plead for amnesty, to have Jor-El speak on behalf of my mother and I, Jor-El had turned him away. My parents were stripped of their rank and we were cast out of the House of El.”

“Kara…” 

“For four years we lived in the worst part of Argo City. We made due but I...it could be rough, at times.” Kara swallows and blinks back tears. “It could be rough, but my mother and father loved me. Loved each other, still, despite everything. I had friends, Alex. I miss them every day,” she sniffs, lifting a hand to rub furiously at her eyes. “I wish I had died with them on Krypton.”

"_No._" Alex makes a soft noise of protest. “Don’t say that,” she murmurs, curling in and around Kara, blanketing her entirely. “Your parents sent you here because they wanted you to live, Kara.” She pushes up on her elbow to lean over and press a tender kiss to fluttering eyelids. “And you have. You’re _ so _ strong. Not just physically. You’ve adapted, you’ve survived.” Alex fingers slide along Kara’s cheek before she cups it gently. “You’re a fighter, Kara Zor-El. So _ live _,” she quietly implores. “Keep living. For yourself, for them.” Alex brushes her palm along tear-stained skin as she waits for Kara to meet her gaze. Peering into dark swirls of blue, Alex feels something in her stomach tighten and heave. She swallows thickly. “For me too, okay?”

It takes a moment but eventually Kara nods, resigned, but staring at her with an intensity that makes Alex’s chest burn and...

**x**

...and Kara finds herself annoyed mostly. She’s a stranger in a strange land trapped in a familiar body that doesn’t behave like her own. Things break and shatter around her if she stops focusing for even a second. She feels the rustling of baser instincts coiled deep inside, knows the meaning behind it and dreads what will happen when they come to fruition. The loss of status had meant loss of benefits that came with it, which had included the delicate process of muting those urges and tempering them into something neat and orderly. 

The Yellow Sun only heightens a need that would have been manageable on Krypton. Kara knows it won't be long before that longing to bare her teeth and pump herself into slick heat burns through her. The idea of it makes her nauseated with grief and exhaustion. Another way she's dissimilar from the heritage she once held so dear. 

It starts slowly but soon she starts to notice honeyed scents, the appealing quality of soft viable omegas who would open so sweetly for her. One omega in particular, really. She grits her teeth at the recurring thought and turns on her side. Her foster sister shifts in bed behind her, follows her movements in a sleepy cadence. Alex plants her arms firmly around Kara’s stomach, hums faintly in Kara’s ear before slipping back into unconsciousness, none the wiser to the turmoil brewing deep in the marrow of Kara’s bones. 

Fatigue heightens shallow breathing. It’ll be another restless night. 

Kara is mindful in the way she slides out of bed, careful not to jostle Alex as she extracts herself from her foster sisters hold. She gazes down at Alex intently, brushes the pad of her fingers along a sloped nose and the curve of an angled jaw before releasing a shuddery breath. Picking up her pillow, she sets it where the imprint of her body once lay and watches in amusement as Alex buries herself in the lingering scent. Kara floats across the room to grab her cellphone and make her way downstairs.

She calls Kal. 

Clark, Kal-El, Superman, the Symbol of Truth, and Justice. Kara’s not sure what to make of her cousin. She doubts she would have gotten the chance to actually get to know him back on Krypton, so his disinterest in her barely registers most days. Kara does wonder sometimes what life could have been like if they had landed at the same time. How would she have gone about raising a child in a foreign land? Her parents had sprung the idea on her without stopping to consider her feelings on the matter. Not that she can really blame them, given the extreme circumstances. 

Still, he’s family. They share blood. That had meant something once. Kara wishes she could find significance in the concept. Her father and Jor-El shared blood too. Blood bonds can only go so far, she supposes.

Clark answers on the third ring, a cautious ‘Hello?’ as he holds the phone to his ear. Kara sighs and greets him.

"Clark,” she starts, hoping the use of his human names mitigates any potential defensiveness. “I need to ask you about how you handled...” She reaches up to grip the necklace her mother left her in an attempt to ground herself. “Your coming to age.” 

Kara hears the confused intake of air, can practically sense her cousins immediate discomfort and can’t help but rolls her eyes at it. She listens closely as Clark eventually finds his footing and stammers his way through an explanation.

“-overall, it will be different for you, Kara,” he sniffs as he concludes the curt retelling of his own formative years. “You’ll have to regulate your strength when you’re inside, mostly, but no one should notice. Omegas expect alphas to be able to overpower them,” he mutters with no small amount of bitterness. For a moment, Kara mourns for the lost boy who never experienced a society where you were valued for more than what’s between your legs. Clark will never truly be Kal-El, a son of the great House of El, descendant to the legion of omega scions who had held high ranking positions on Krypton. 

She thanks him quietly and hangs up the phone. Kara wanders over to the kitchen and pulls out a large bowl from the cabinet. She fills it mindlessly to the brim with milk and cereal and chews slowly on her food as she considers the implications of being an alpha in a society already rife with prejudice and strife. 

What kind of hurt will she impart if she was to give into her wants? 

Kara can only shudder at the possibilities. 

**x**


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, all! Just wanted to say the support and feedback has been amazing so far. Really appreciate all of you guys taking the time out to leave a comment letting you know how you feel about the story. Means a lot to me! Hope you enjoy this chapter as well.

**xxx**

There’s a degree of skepticism to be had regarding the Danvers claim to fame. Alleged experts in Kryptonian biology they very well may be, and yet, they still seem to forget one of the key fundamentals of her makeup. Or maybe they are just apathetic about it.

Why else would her would be, could be foster parents make attempts at hushed disciplines. Eliza murmurs scathing remarks above the drip of the faucet sink. Jeremiah hums at contemptuous retellings of how Kara’s mistakes translate into those of Alex’s.

Kara hears everything. Harsh undertones may as well be jackrabbits thumping in her ear. 

There are no spoken secrets in this house. 

It’s another one of those times. Kara wakes to the sound of a clear scolding. Sighing, she turns onto her back as she listens to Eliza berate Alex for problems not of her foster sisters making. A spark of agitation cuts through her. She had once found it easier to let the humans sort out their own issues, but the need to speak up on Alex's behalf had grown alongside their bond. 

Kara scratches at her temple lightly, considering her options as she listens to Eliza dive into all the ways Alex disappoints her. The disapproval in Eliza’s tone is almost stifling in its familiarity. She doesn’t understand the passivity Alex’s parents employ towards her while simultaneously suffocating their actual daughter under the weight of their expectations. Alex excels in school and sports. Doesn't stay out late, doesn't talk back to teachers. Minds her tone around authority. 

Sure, there were a few choices Alex had made that Kara didn’t necessarily agree with, but overall, she's just happy to have Alex in her life in any way she can, as whoever Alex chooses to be. Alex is perfect in her little imperfections and Kara can’t help but find herself drawn to them.

She stares absently at the rotating ceiling fan as her thoughts momentarily drift to that of Krypton. Kara remembers how she would stay out late gambling with Jin-Gall and Romi Wem-Dar. Thinks of how she used to participate in rigged fights with the other guildless. 

Considers all the things she had to do in order to scrape together just enough money to help pay off the asshats from the Military Guild who would conduct surprise ‘patrols’ through the slums of Argo, extorting money from families that were already struggling to put food on the table. 

On the days spent recovering from bruised knuckles and broken bones, Kara would lie awake until dawn, kept up not by the pain of her injuries, but by the soft sound of her mother crying as her father lamented their guildless status.

Her parents had felt as though they failed her when it was Kara who had to be bribed out of the Pit or carried home slumped on Jin’s shoulders after a particularly rough night. 

Alura and Zor-El would have loved to have a daughter like Alex.

The memories bleed together in a harsh smear. She blinks away stray tears with a grimace. Kara sits up and harshly wipes at her face before standing to grab her hoodie from Alex’s desk. She speeds her way downstairs, stopping soundlessly right outside the kitchen to take a moment to gather herself.

Eliza’s on her second verse of diatribe when she finally steps through the entryway. Kara looks between her foster sister and Eliza with a muted expression. Near the table Alex stands with her arms crossed, frame as rigid as steel, crumbling inwardly on herself. Eliza remembers a second too late to reshape her features into something amenable when she turns to Kara with a smile a tad too bright to be genuine. 

“Oh, good morning, sweetheart. Didn’t hear you come down,” Eliza wipes at the ends of her apron before gesturing towards the spread of food, “Alex was just helping me with breakfast," she clicks her tongue, brows furrowing together unhappily, "If only to make up for not being there for you when you needed her.”

The vague admonishment doesn’t go unnoticed by either of them. Kara’s mouth parts as the light around Alex dims into a sleek pastel. Red outlines the hollows of dark eyes and Kara can feel aggravation curl around her throat like a vice.

Tension stifles the air as distress emanates from Alex in a way that has that thing inside Kara ache to snap its teeth in defiance. She takes a shallow breath, chest heavy with hostility. Her feet move before she thinks to give them the command and she ends up beside Alex the second Eliza turns her back. Kara’s gaze shifts from Alex to Eliza and back again. The rage is palpable, thick on her tongue, and she goes to speak when she hears the low murmur of her name. Kara looks towards Alex warily, noting how affection shades Alex's features. An apology softens the edges of her mouth. 

“Yeah, well,” Alex hums as she discreetly reaches over to run a soothing palm along Kara’s arm, “I don’t mind doing nice things for my star girl,” she whispers gently. 

Kara swallows then, throat closing up as heat coils in her chest. She lowers her head shyly as Alex releases a soft laugh and leans into her side. Alex is usually so careful with open displays of affection, especially around her parents. Kara's heart thumps as she fights off the urge to wrap Alex up in her arms and hold on as tight as Alex can handle. 

“Honestly, though, Alex,” Eliza continues on as if Alex hadn’t spoken and levels her with a stare that causes even Kara to straighten up out of an instinctive reverence towards the leader of the pack, “Alone for hours with all of those alphas. What were you thinking?”

The stutter to Alex’s heart resonates in Kara like a blow to the stomach. She seems restless in the way indignation tightens her fist.

Alex lets out a small, disbelieving laugh as she stares at her mother incredulously, “Wow, mom, that’s…” she falters, a loss for words. A breathless chuckle falls from her mouth as she runs a palm back through her hair, “God, I don’t even know what to _ say _ to that.”

The way Alex's anger affects her powers makes Kara shift uneasily. She feels off balance, out of place, abuzz with a vicious energy that makes her want to crawl out of her skin. Kara does her best to tune her hearing to the strong, rising beat of Alex’s heart as she practices breathing techniques developed for sensory overload. 

“What exactly do you believe I do in my free time?” Alex continues acerbically, on a roll now, “Let alpha’s take turns mounting me on the beach?”

Heat sears and stings at Kara's eyes unexpectedly and she slaps a palm over them in panic. 

Eliza jerks back, shock evident in her gaze. Her mouth twists down, "Alex-" 

"No, you don't get to do this, mom," Alex’s voice rises the longer she goes on, "You don't get to make disgusting insinuations about me and have it be okay." 

"I did _ no _such thing, Alexandra," Eliza snaps, baring her teeth, "and if you had just been there for your sister I wouldn’t have-”

“Enough!” Kara growls, closed fist slamming back and through the wall beside her, shattering picture frames and fraying wires along with the drywall. The room goes still with only Kara’s harsh breathing and Eliza’s racing heartbeat standing out to Kara’s overstimulated ears. She grimaces and carefully extracts her hand from the newfound opening, flexing it before lowering it to her side. 

“That’s enough,” Kara repeats before inhaling a ragged breath. She grapples with control over her heat vision before gradually opening her eyes once she feels it's manageable. 

Her irises glow a deep burgundy. An edge of violence, but not quite. 

She gives Eliza a pointed stare, notices how her foster mother takes a minute step backwards at the look. Involuntary, really. The subconscious fear on Eliza’s face is almost enough to make Kara feel guilty. 

Almost.

“If Alex is anymore ‘there for me’, we’d be sharing molecules, Eliza," Kara states plainly, brows knitting together in a frown, "Alex isn't to blame for my mistakes anymore than you are," her eyes shift back to a deep blue as her heartbeat steadies, "Please stop accusing her of things she's not guilty of." 

The tension seems to disappear with the returning of Kara’s regular eye color. Eliza lets out a tiny, relieved breath, the sound unnoticeable to anyone who doesn’t have super hearing, and shakes her head, "That wasn't what I was doing, Kara," she holds up a palm when Alex starts to cut in. She waits to make sure Alex is listening before she continues, "Though perhaps I could have phrased it better," Eliza concedes with a grimace. She looks over at Alex, a gentleness entering her eyes that hadn't been there before, "I simply meant that it's not safe for you, Alex." Discomfort tightens her features, "I know you can take care of yourself. We _ raised _ you to be able to take care of yourself, but," Eliza takes a deep breath, "but society isn't fair to omegas and putting yourself in a situation with people who can harm you, regardless of whether or not you believe them to be friends, was not smart, Alex."

Alex seems to deflate at that, curling in on herself as both she and Kara register the meaning behind her mother's words.

Kara grits her teeth as the implications of what it means to be an _ omega _ in this world once again sinks in. Small reminders of how vile things are on Earth. She can forget sometimes, but it's always there, lingering in the background. The thought of what _ could _ happen to Alex. 

There's an awkward silence that rings out for several long seconds before Eliza sighs and pulls a chair out to sit down. 

"The food is getting cold, girls," Eliza says with a resigned smile, "we should eat."

**x**

Alex needs air after that. She asks to be excused in a mumble and exits the house with Kara following dutifully behind. 

Kara watches her carefully, notes the bitter stride to Alex's step and the defiance that rounds her shoulders before looking away.

It’s windy out. The air is clear though there is a slight hint of the rot. Kara has gotten to the point where she is able to attune her senses onto one specific source if she focuses hard enough. It’s almost enough to deaden the more revolting smells. Almost. The lead in her glasses helps, as does the girl in front of her, even with the anxiety rolling off of Alex in waves.

Kara's eyes flutter as she soaks up rays of light. The sun shines bright above them. The road to is mostly empty, possibly a result of the early morning travels.

Leaves rustle around them. Kara picks up the shuffling of a deer far out, the crawl of beetles, birds chirping obnoxiously. She trains her ears to the rhythmic thump of Alex’s heart as she starts to hum the melody of a song her mother sang to her when she was young. 

Eventually Alex seems to tire and pauses in her gait. She turns to Kara with a small frown and regards her in that soft, speculative manner Kara has grown so fond of, “What was that back there? You don’t usually get involved when mom is chewing me out.”

Blue eyes darken and narrow before purposefully shifting away. Alex’s own widen in response. “Then there’s that,” Alex breathes, voice alight with awe and curiosity. A welcome change from the unhappiness that once resided there. She steps further into Kara’s space, “Your eyes turned red just now. Like before, with mom,” Alex places a hand on Kara’s chin and stands on her tippy toes to peer up at Kara closely. 

Kara stares back at Alex with a vacant expression. She doesn’t want to talk about what happened. She doesn’t want to talk about anything that reminds her of Alex possibly getting hurt. 

“Did they?” Kara asks, lips thinning out. She debates on what information, if any, she’s willing to share with her foster sister before her shoulder lifts, a half shrug in lieu of an answer.

A long suffering groan escapes from Alex’s mouth as dark eyes roll dramatically, “Fine then,” she sniffs before giving Kara a teasing pout, “keep your secrets. Jerk.”

The corners of Kara’s mouth curl up at the light teasing as the sinking feeling in her stomach lightens. She finally gives into the urge to pull Alex into her and wraps her arms snugly around her foster sisters waist, “I thought I was your ‘star girl’, Alex,” she breathes, nudging Alex's nose with her own as she presses their foreheads together. 

An appealing flush works its way up Alex’s cheeks at her words and Kara beams at the sight of it. Alex ducks her head with a huff, crossing her arms in a show of annoyance. She does nothing to try and escape Kara’s hold. Her facade of irritation lasts only for a second before she’s winding her arms up and around Kara’s back and squeezing Kara just as tight. Alex buries her face in Kara’s neck with a small sigh, “Only when you’re being good.”

Kara can’t help but grin as warmth spreads through her front. 

Alex is soft, so soft and light. Her sister's weight barely even registers. Kara’s head goes foggy with excitement. 

She could pick Alex up. It wouldn’t take much of anything, really. She could take Alex far from here, away from the confines of the small town of Midvale. Far from Alex’s parents, to a place where they’re free of expectations. Concealed from prying, judgmental eyes. Kara could hold her tight, keep Alex locked away with her, protect her, eagerly indulge in her warmth. 

_ Sharing molecules _she had said. 

It’s almost disconcerting, in a way. How much she just..._ wants. _

It’s that realization that startles her out of the haze. A deep flush works it way up her cheeks as she finally notices the throbbing in her pants. 

She’s hard. 

Flinching, she quickly lets go of Alex, that soft, tender thing inside of her scurrying back into the depths.

“I-I’ll be sure to keep that in mind for later,” Kara mumbles, turning from Alex then, eyes downcast. She slips her hand into her jean pockets and squeezes them into fists, completely unsettled by how quickly her thoughts got away from her. 

Alex can’t know the things her body tells her she wants. Alex would hate her for it, would lump her in with the others. Just another alpha with one thing on their mind. Kara can’t be that person. She just can’t. 

Kare bites her lip to the edge of bleeding. 

Alex frowns at the sudden change, “Kara, what's-” she starts, going to place a palm on Kara’s arm only for Kara to cringe before she can make contact and twist away in obvious discomfort. 

The flash of hurt that goes across Alex’s face makes something inside Kara _ ache _. She catches Alex’s hand in a fumbling hold, and gently curls her fingers around a slender wrist. Kara delicately brushes her thumb against the pulsing vein. 

Alex looks to their hands before gazing up at her cautiously, “I know things got a bit intense with mom but, but those things she said,” she chews on her bottom lip, suddenly overtaken by nerves, “you and me, um, we're okay, right? You know I wouldn’t-”

“I know,” Kara gently interrupts, letting out a shaky exhale. The tension in her shoulders lessens as she looks over Alex fondly, “I know, Alex. I just...worry for you.”

“Well, I worry about you too,” Alex encourages Kara to loosen the hold on her and adjust her grip so that they’re holding hands, “Besides, the chances of that stuff happening,” she pauses, licking at her lips before giving a careful smile, “It’s really not as bad as she made it sound, Kara.”

It’s a good poker face but not perfect. Kara saddens at the sight of subtle cracks, “I’d never let anything happen to you,” she promises in a whisper, "I’ll do anything to keep you safe, Alex.” 

An uncomfortable longing burns through her chest as her stomach ties up in knots. It doesn’t help that she can still feel the pulsing in her jeans that keeps time with the steady beating of Alex’s heart. Alex deserves to be happy. Kara wishes she could make her happy.

Alex shifts in place, expression unclear. Kara’s gaze narrows in concentration. It’s not exactly unease she senses from her foster sister but close enough. She swallows. Maybe she’s said too much. Maybe she didn’t say enough. She goes to release Alex’s hand but falters when she feels a slight increase of pressure. 

Kara meets Alex’s eyes timidly. 

There’s a slight twitch to Alex’s mouth and then a sudden warmth that emanates from Alex’s face as a tight laugh falls from her mouth, “You should leave the worrying to me, star girl,” Alex says shakily as she moves forward to slump into Kara’s side, “I'm the big sister. It's my job to do the protecting. ”

Kara’s lips purse at that. An objection hangs on the tip of her tongue but she pauses when she notices Alex’s wistful smile. Sighing, Kara frame eases from its tense coil as she looks forward with a nod, “Sure, Alex,” she agrees quietly, unable to deny Alex this, “if that’s really what you want.”

Alex brushes a brief kiss against Kara’s shoulder in response.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"Really though, can't believe you punched a hole through the wall."

"I was _ upset, _Alex! You try controlling yourself with dozens of stimuli assaulting your senses."

"Yeah, yeah, just make you don't tell Dad it happened because I was fighting with Mom."

"Sure, but it's gonna cost you."

"Oh for Gods- fine, I'll buy you a pizza."

"_Two _whole pizzas and an order of potstickers on the side. Deal?"

"Whatever, goofball. Deal."

**x**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wanted to change up the visual effect of Kara and Clark's heat vision for this fic. If you need an idea of what it looks like, check out Brandon Breyer from Brightburn. I love how his eyes glow red right before he uses it but the heat vision doesn't take up the entirety of his irises until the very last second. Anyway, until next time!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all of the support! The kudos and comments mean a lot, I am so happy to see that so many of you are enjoying the story. Really looking forward to seeing what you guys think of this chapter!

**xxx**

Rhythmic. Alex follows the motion of her hand as she brushes her fingers along the smooth lines of Kara’s stomach beneath a cotton shirt. Kara is all soft skin and hard muscles and strength coiled in a slender frame. Molten steel beneath her touch. 

There's a distinct call of an owl perched trees away, the chirp of crickets, cicadas buzzing beneath their window. The night drags on. Alex’s head rests lightly against the space between her foster sister’s collar and chest. Sleep is elusive, lost with Kara’s arrival to this Earth. Alex doesn’t mind the restless night. More time alone with Kara could never be a bad thing. Naps become friends she holds dear, second nature. She sighs into the slope of Kara’s neck.

For once, Kara sleeps. A rarity. Sound moderation doesn’t come easily to unconscious minds. Better now than before. Alex has hope that one day Kara will sleep through a full night without the noises from the world disrupting her. An indulgence really. Exhaustion doesn’t plague Kryptonian bones. They could all only be so lucky. 

She lifts her head at a brief whimper, hums as she reaches up to soothe the crinkle between Kara’s brow. A nightmare maybe? Kara has those often. The arm looped around Alex’s shoulder tightens, just a bit. No fear of broken bones, the solution to a problem long sought. Found only after panic induced mornings spent with accidents from lapses in strength. Kara has this down at least. 

Alex burrows into Kara’s warmth, slides a leg up along Kara’s front until she’s partially draped over Kara’s thigh. The contact soothes them both. She inches up to gently nose the hollow of Kara’s throat, “Shh, it’s okay, ” she murmurs as she presses her mouth to sunkissed skin, “You’re safe, Kara. I got you, you’re safe.”

She continues in a mantra even as Kara’s lashes flutter open. Alex smiles as dark gleams of blue drift to gaze down at her. Little galaxies in her wake. She keeps up the tender trailing of her fingers as she raises up to kiss Kara’s cheek. 

Kara’s nose wrinkles before she partially shifts and tugs Alex closer, “_You_ should be sleeping,” she grumbles, easing back to look at Alex in worry laced disapproval.

Alex shrugs as best she can in this position, giving an amused grin, “well if  _ someone  _ had stopped wrestling with my covers while trying to cuddle with me, maybe I would be.”

Even in the dark, Alex can see how red shades Kara’s cheeks as an abashed expression crosses her face, “w-well, I mean,” Kara stutters around her words, "I just thought, you know, you don’t really need blankets. I can keep you warm,” she scratches at her cheek lightly, flustered, though no shame clouds her tone. 

Alex’s chest tightens, that familiar emotion constricting into an ache. Lately it’s been like that. Moments where she finds herself caught, ensnared in a cocoon of her own making. Surrendering herself to the depths of Kara’s affections. 

“You do,” Alex assures in a whisper, inching closer to press an open kiss to Kara’s jaw, “God, Kara, you really do," she gently brushes her nose along Kara's cheek before kissing it, "in so many ways,” she lets out a breathy sigh as Kara’s palm slips under the back of her shirt and warmth trails along her sides until a heavy hold settles on her waist.

There’s a fog that passes over her at times where the air is so sweet she can taste it. She finds herself saying things that should be kept, indulging the undercurrent of heat that coats their actions. 

Kara’s eyes darken to a faint glow of red and Alex finds herself drawn into an eclipse, tethering the line of something and then-

And then…

A grimace slips over Kara’s mouth, tension halting her touch. Alex can feel it throughout the length of Kara’s body until she can’t feel anything at all. Kara sits up and away, planting herself on the edge of her bed as she grips the bedding in her palms. Alex frowns, goes to follow the movement, wants to ask what’s wrong but Kara's detached expression culls the urge. 

Worry ruminates beneath her tongue but she can only watch as delicate shivers race along the slope of Kara’s back.

Kara sniffs and rub at her nose, throwing a brief glance Alex’s way before semi-curling over her lap, “Sorry, I'm, um, feeling kind of off,” she states in a stilted voice, “I’m going to go to the bathroom,” Kara reworks her features into a distant smile as she looks over at Alex fondly, “try to sleep,” she murmurs.

She’s gone before Alex can blink. A sticky feeling of heat and unease weaves a path through her stomach and Alex frowns, confused and dejected, embarrassment warming her skin. A prickling at the back of her mind tells her that something is wrong but she stomps down the warning and puts it back in place. 

Alex ignores the alarm that agitates her chest and lays back down, set to wait for Kara to return so any lingering concerns can be allayed. She reminds herself this is fine, that they’ll talk soon, that everything is okay because why wouldn’t it be when she’s done nothing wrong. Another mantra to play. 

And when she wakes up hours later to a vacant room, tucked into her own bed, well, Alex pretends that's fine too. 

**x**

Can an educational system bordering remedial actually be considered educational? Kara has to wonder. When Eliza and Jeremy had first suggested she attend Midvale High, Kara had wrinkled her nose at the idea, realizing what attending  _ American High School  _ would fully entail. She knows the elder Danvers are considered smart by human standards but she wonders if that intelligence only extends to the sciences. How could spending hours on end in a building filled to the brim with hormonal, emotional,  _ squawking _ teenagers be a good idea? Misplaced faith, perhaps? Even Alex had not been able to avoid bruises and broken bones. What would putting her in a room full of walking confetti accomplish other than a headache and guaranteed exposure? Still, Eliza and Jeremiah had  _ insisted _ . 

_ “You need to be with kids your own age _ ,” they said, “  _ Learn to fit in. Interact. Be human.” _

Be human. Kara scoffs at the very notion. They just don't get it.  _ Can't  _ get it. There are no ‘kids her own age.’ She’s barely a kid herself. Though her body may have been lost in time, her mind had not. Dark, empty space filled the realm of the Phantom Zone with only inclinations of fear and regret to keep her company. For a while, Kara had believed the quiet to be preferable to that of her time on Earth. At least in the void of space she didn’t have to conjure fairytales of a human life. 

There’s a drip from a leaky faucet three floors down. The scrape of sneakers on linoleum. The screech of a whistle from basketball practice. Noises everywhere. Constant swarm of stimuli. Kara stands in front of her locker and packs her bag slowly. She dulls her senses the best she can at school, keeps her breathing to a minimum, and tunes her hearing to the steady "thump" of her foster sisters heartbeat. Alex is the only reason she's able to get through class without tearing into herself. If only to avoid lashing out and hurting someone.

Kara wishes she were at home, under cover. She can’t help but feel a bit guilty from this morning. Kara had never shied away from blanket honesty with Alex, especially when they were alone. It was unfair to start now. 

Maybe she should talk to Alex about her feelings? Kara frowns, staring vacantly at her bag. She doesn’t want to lose Alex’s affections, but how selfish would it be for her to carry on behaving like she doesn’t want what she wants, that she doesn’t feel like she does, like she isn’t infatuated with the intensity of their bond.

Though lost in thought, she’s aware of how students gather in groups of threes and fours in the hallway behind her, the elation in their voices grating to her ears. Talks of TV shows, movies, conquests. Nothing is off limits. Everything is on the table. The congregations are formulaic to a degree, indicative of a greater societal expectation. Safety in numbers, they say. While temporary for some, these alignments often proved to be a lifetime commitment for those who would not make it far outside the confines of small town Midvale, destined to live out a meaningless existence committed to a baseline group. 

Though an alpha herself, her nonconforming demeanor has left her at a standstill. The other alphas mistake her apathy for weakness, and the omegas, not used to an alpha not actively vying after them, avoid her as well. Thankfully Kara doesn’t actually have to engage with the pack she’s a part of. Her odd circumstances and relation to Alex allows Alex’s influence to extend to her, though only to a middling degree. Just enough for people to leave her alone most days. 

No matter how high up in the pack Alex may be, she is still ‘just an omega,’ to many of her peers. Alex often tends to veer towards silence, regardless of circumstance. Speaking out against the injustices her fellow pack members commit would most likely result in a loss of status and a loss of status means a loss of safety. Kara understands the delicate role Alex must play when they’re in public. She keeps an appropriate distance between the two of them during school to not make Alex’s life any harder for her than need be. Kara can handle circling the perimeter of Midvale High's ‘elite’ if it means Alex’s continued protection. Besides, Kara doesn’t actually mind fading into the background. The calm is something she looks forward to. 

A light shuffling and a spike of a heart rate close in. Kara tilts her head back and looks over to find Kenny Li walking a straight path towards her. Kenny is in her astronomy class. Nice kid. Quiet, but kind. A few conversations here and there but nothing substantial. She wonders what he could possibly want. 

Brow ticking up, Kara sweeps her gaze over him, notes his shy smile and the anxious way his grip tightens on the strap of his backpack, before closing her locker. 

“Did you need something, Kenny?” Kara asks, tone muted as she shoves the last book in her own bag and swings it over her shoulder. She shifts her stance as she waits for him to answer. It takes him a moment but eventually he stutters his way through a question and makes sense of his approach. Kara feels a spark of compassion flow through her. 

“I appreciate the offer, Kenny,” she starts, voice gentle, “but I’ll have to pass. I’m busy tonight,” she manages a small smile even as he visibly deflates. Stargazing is fun in theory, but depressing in actuality. The last thing she wants to do is break down in front of a stranger just because she can see the nothingness that once gave way to the path to Krypton.

“Oh, well. Maybe some other time?” He looks up at her then, hopeful glint in his eye, and Kara can’t help wondering what he’s aiming at. Kenny is one of the few omegas that actually talks to her. She’d hate to ruin their amicable relationship based off something as moronic as a swell of hormones. 

She opens her mouth to respond but falters when someone knocks into Kenny’s shoulder and forces him forward. Her gaze shifts and she frowns at the three boys who crowd around them. Nose wrinkling in distaste, Kara scents them and notes that they must be alpha given the overbearing smell. 

The boys each take turns pushing at Kenny, be it with a shoulder or the palm of their hands, taking apparent delight in Kenny's struggles to remain upright. Finally his books are knocked into the floor and Kenny lurches forward helplessly as he falls to his knees in order to collect them. 

“Ooh, baby, you know just how I like it,” one of the alpha’s snarls with a wolfish grin as he grabs at his junk and thrusts his hips forward in an obscene gesture. The other boys around him laugh, practically howling at the nonsensical hilarity of it. 

Disgust curls in Kara's stomach as she sees Kenny darken in humiliation. The smell wafts off of him unpleasantly. Kara grits her teeth, racking her brain as she tries to remember who the alphas are. She’s pretty sure they’re in Alex’s pack, which unfortunately meant they were in  _ hers.  _ Sure enough, Alex stands in the back with her other packmates, face studiously devoid of emotion though brown eyes scream with a regret that only Kara can see. Kara takes a step forward but hesitates when Alex gives a minute shake of her head. She closes her eyes instead and turns away.

Kara gently sets her bag on the floor before bending down on one knee to pick up a discarded book. She reads the cover, a smile ticking up the corners of her mouth as she runs her fingers along the binding, “These are in nice condition, Kenny. I can tell you take good care of them.” she states calmly, deliberately ignoring the three alphas behind her. Showing your back to another alpha can be seen as either a show of submission or as lack of regard for the others strength. Kara doesn’t care which way they take it. 

_ Like these carbon bags of flesh can actually do anything to harm me. _

It’s a horrible thought. She does her best to fight against her more reprehensible inclinations but the struggle to remain passive is one she must contend with during times like these. 

She keeps her eyes firmly locked on Kenny’s and holds the book towards him in a loose grip, waiting for his play. Kenny bites his lip, gaze flicking to the astronomy book and then back to her before he takes it with shaky fingers. 

Kara gathers the rest of Kenny’s books and helps him to his feet, speaking to him in low tones as the alphas behind them chuckle, seemingly unaffected. 

Submission it is then.

“You look good on your knees, Li,”one if the alpha leans over Kara’s shoulder like she’s not there, grin in place as he stares Kenny down. He clicks his tongue mockingly, “You know, I can teach you a few things. We can even get a few of the other alphas from the basketball team to join in. Make a day out of it. 

"Score a three pointer with the boys," the alpha behind the one near Kara snickers, "knot for one special." 

It clicks with Kara then, the names of the three boys. She recalls the many times Alex had come home in a huff, grumbling in irritation as she complained about the more boorish alphas in her pack. Kara resists the intense urge to sigh as she hears Jensen snicker and slap Landace along his back cheerfully. 

“Let’s get out of here, Jens,” Cameron speaks up, barely sparing Kenny or Kara a glance as he juts his thumb backwards, “You know how the teachers get when we play around with the omegas,” though there’s an air of nonchalance to his words, Kara immediately picks up on the nervous hitch to Cameron’s voice. She narrows her gaze at Cameron as he fidgets in place. Landace shrugs, indifferent but amiable, and while Jensen makes a show of huffing his displeasure, he ultimately nods in acquiescence and leads the other boys away. 

“Pft, whatever. The omegas never report us...” 

She watches them turn the corner of the hallway with a frown before looking over to Kenny. He looks noticeably shaken up, discomfort apparent in his stance as he waits, shame glossing over his features. Kara hums and allows her scent to become more prominent, knowing it has the ability to soothe. Kenny’s eyes flutter and the tight hold to his shoulders loosens, just a bit. Kara adjusts his books in her grip and picks up her backpack once more.

“Maybe you can tell me about the Andromeda galaxy on our way to class?” she suggests quietly. A certain sadness radiates from him as he gives a jerky nod but Kara does her best to distract from that as they walk towards their classroom.

And though her heartbeat is already across the school, Kara can’t help glancing over at the space Alex once occupied with a thoughtful expression.

**x**

The next few days passed in a haze of red. Kara finds herself spending nights in the woods with Kenny, watching the sky, counting the constellations. They eat snacks and share a quiet laugh or two over silly jokes and idioms Kara finds out of place. Kenny learns to avoid probing deeper, to keep conversations surface level. It’s nice.

On her third night out, Alex stops her at the door. A palm settling on the curve of her bicep before drawing away. Alex watches her with furrowed brows as Kara tugs on worn sneakers and goes about tying the knots.

“You’ve been spending a lot of time out of the house lately,” Alex starts after a moment, leaning against the doorway with arms crossed, “what have you been getting up to?”

Though it’s asked casually, Kara can sense the discontent in her foster sister’s tone. She keeps her eyes down as she observes the soles of her shoes, noting how the sides are beginning to hang loose. A downside of super speed. She sighs as she sits back and turns her gaze up.

“Just hanging out with Kenny,” Kara takes care to match the air of nonchalance, “we go to the park sometimes. The woods too.”

“Oh,” the frown deepens, “Kenny Li. The omega.” It slips out in a contemplative manner, but it doesn’t sound like a question. Kara hums and stands with casual ease, attempts to catch the dark in a now flighty gaze. She steps into Alex’s space and leans over her carefully, brushes aside auburn locks to press a kiss to Alex’s temple.

“More than just an omega,” she reminds Alex kindly, inching back to meet reserved eyes, “but only just a friend.”

Kara doesn’t know why she felt the need to add the last part but she’s glad she did. The comment seems to calm Alex at least, though not by much. Alex pensively chews on her bottom lip before flashing Kara a clipped smile.

“Okay,” she says, moving aside with her palms on her hips, “be home before mom and dad notice,” she wrinkles her nose a bit, “don’t really feel like getting yelled at because you want to stay out late.”

Kara purses her lips but doesn’t respond to the fleeting remark, choosing instead to watch as Alex makes her way upstairs. She waits until she hears the click of their bedroom door before turning away. 

The space is nice, in an abstract way. Gives her time to think, consider her options. Work on fixing her little...problem. It may be good for them, even. Alex had been forced to babysit her in the beginning and they grew close as a result of that. There had been no room for anyone else. Even the elder Danvers weren’t around as much. 

It’s good for Kara to have others, if only so Alex doesn’t feel guilty when going out with her own friends. It’s good for them, in concept. Being away from Alex and her warmth. 

As reality would have it, Kara finds herself just a little miserable without.

**x**

Kara grips her head with a grimace, making quick strides to the abandoned bathroom down below. It’s her safe space at school outside of Alex, something tangible she can rely on when things get to be too much.

The pep rally in the auditorium rages on with her teacher none the wiser to her departure. Too many bodies to account for the abyssal alpha, the phantom perched by the wall. The clangs of cymbals attached to shoddy drums clenches her teeth. Scents are mixed in a blend of heady and off putting. Everything falls into itself. She found herself too close to the source of discontent and ducked out of the assembly before they could find their seats. Kara skips the last five steps and speeds her way to her final destination. 

Her steps falter when she picks up a now familiar scent and the not so familiar one lingering beside it. Unease makes the thing inside her wake and she slows her gait to a human level. Eyeing the door in front of her, Kara contemplates on using her X-Ray vision to find what lies in wait before her. The decision is made when the door opens and a disheveled looking boy steps out. 

_ Cameron _

The name clicks in a seconds time and she narrows her eyes respectively. He notices her in the same moment and he straightens to his full height. 

“Danvers,” he nods in way of greeting, does his best to look cool and restrained but Kara can sense panic permeating the air. She flicks her tongue along distended fangs, surprise rushing through her at their unexpected arrival. Another biological disparity. She opts to ignore them to instead follow Cameron with a cold gaze. He clears his throat and starts to walk around her.

“Uh, I better get back to the assembly. They’re expecting me,” he smiles lightly as he begins his tread upwards, before rushing to the top of the stairs and then disappearing around the corner.

Kara’s instincts flare and recede and she clenches her jaw, willing her newfound additions to return to their proper place. Once situated, she continues her journey to the bathroom, fearing what she already knows.

When Kara finds Kenny, he's hunched over in a bathroom stall, hiding his face in the space between held knees. There’s a buzzing in the air as the anger returns and Kara fights between the urge to  _ break  _ and _help._

"It was consensual.”

Kara freezes, her body going stock still at the mumbled words. Her brows furrow as she stares down at Kenny, unsure when he noticed her arrival. “I know what you’re thinking, but don’t. It was consensual,” he says again, lifting his head to show red rimmed eyes. He sniffs, extending his legs out in front of him as he settles further against the wall, “Cam, um,” he takes a deep breath, a shudder wracking his form, “I guess he’s kind of my boyfriend. A heat buddy, maybe. We’ve been doing this for about a year,” Kenny says it like he expects Kara to judge him, but Kara is far away from that point. She puts the pieces together for herself rather quickly, but finds she doesn’t quite like how the puzzle fits. Kara rubs at her face and wills him to continue with an open palm. 

He smiles a bit at their secret code, takes comfort in their shared language as he resumes his speech, “It's my fault we're not out,” Kenny states, smile fading into a muted line, “A packless omega with a high tier alpha?” he lets out a watery chuckle, “His packmates would crucify him. He’d be dropped to the lowest rung, or worse, kicked out entirely. Even I know I'm not worth that,” he swallows thick around the words, as if forcing the sentence out is almost too much, “we meet down here sometimes to be together. I don’t mind it. It feels good, and well, I mean, I’m lucky, you know?” Kenny mutters as he picks at the hole in his jeans. “At least Cam cares about me,” he says it like everything is fine, like all things are set in stone. Firm, and controlled and resigned, but there are tears in his eyes when he meets hers and a shaky quality to his movements that makes Kara’s stomach hurt. She wants to hug him but can’t find it in her to do anything but stare.

There’s something about touching omegas without verbal consent that she vaguely recalls from her time scouring through guides strewn around her mother’s study. How to navigate the delicate lines and pulls to the mating process. Alura had caught her as she was reading through the fourth cover, had laughed in delight at her attempts to hide. They sat together on the floor then, Alura playing with her hair as she explained that Kara would never have to worry about that process and that everything would be taken care of for her in the years to come. That had been before everything went to Hell, before they lost their status and all of their rights.

Still, it was a fond memory to look back on, one she finds solace in now especially. 

Kara opens her bag hastily, rifling through the contents of it to pull out a juice box and a bag of chips. She says his name, patiently holding them both out to him. He returns her gaze blankly, but when he reaches out towards her to take the food, his fingers brush along her skin. A go ahead of sorts. She sits near him, but not too close to crowd. Kara remembers reading how omegas needed to be taken care of when emotions run high, how the scent of an alpha can often help soothe their worries. 

For once Kara thinks maybe this doesn't have anything to do with their status. Anyone would need comfort when dealing with something like this.

**x**

Alex lays on her stomach with a pillow clutched around her arms, warmth to her chest as Kara plays with her hair beside her. Kara had come straight home after school today, made mention of staying in for the night for the first time in a week, which had drawn a flush of elation to Alex’s cheeks. Kara's presence has been fleeting lately, here one moment, gone the next. Alex is embarrassed by how much she's missed her. Resents the residual swell of imperfection in its wake, a weakness that sits uneasy in her stomach. 

It's an uncomfortable feeling overall. Easier to ignore when they're together, but existing inside her all the same. 

A soothing palm travels down her neck, distracting her from her thoughts. She sighs as Kara's hand gently trails along the length of her back before settling in the middle of it. 

It's then when Kara asks, tone careful and full of meaning, what it’s like for her when she goes into heat. It comes out of nowhere. Alex’s nose wrinkles, the question slow to register, but intense in its regard. She watches blue eyes darken and swirl with curiosity that arcs into caring and Alex’s throat tightens with a swell of appreciation for the girl who belies the very concept of her nature so thoroughly. 

The question, asked several times before, was typically followed by snickers and leers that told a truth better than anything spoken. A shallow breath then has Alex turning on her side, and she reaches behind her to grasp at a nerve wracked form and tug Kara closer. Kara lets out a sigh before Kryptonian level heat spreads along her back.

Alex takes a moment to think of the last time need had overwhelmed her. The lights had grown dim around her until her vision whited out and all that was left was splotches of black and blues, tints of red, shades of grey. Alex sees herself in her mindseye and watches as she wraps her arms around her legs and curls into herself under thick comforters, trying her best not to fade into something indistinct, opaque in all ways but one. 

Her body shakes and quivers with an ache that refuses to be sated with the palm of her hand. Nimble fingers work along her clit, frustration strains her joints until she's stretched wide, and empty, and wanting. She waits with harsh breathing and slicked thighs for the swell of heat to pass until she can finally return to herself. Torn and ragged with sprinklings of shame racing along her skin but herself at least.

Alex’s lips thin out at the gentle call of her name and she exhales a restrained breath as her fingers dig into her own skin.

“Indistinguishable shapes,” Alex murmurs finally, eyes falling close as she buries herself in the pillow before her, “like folding into contrasting figures. Pangs of longing and pain and…” she pauses for a spell, licks her lips, “It hurts. It hurts like nothing I have felt before, Kara,” she sniffs, “I hate how much I want the thing that will make it not hurt,” her voice breaks a little at the end. 

Alex doesn’t know what it’s like for the others but she feels that there’s a trace of commonality there that’s not hard to replicate. Maybe they all were just destined to break a little in the end. 

The air goes still around them and slow prickling of regret pulse through her chest before her heart skips as faint kisses dust along her neck. 

Alex shudders at the tender, “I love you,” that’s whispered into her skin and she squeezes her eyes shut, sinking into herself until all she feels is the warmth that radiates from her alien girl.

**x**


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a lot of fun writing this chapter, once again shout out to the homie costia_gray for talking through it with me. I appreciate all the comments and kudos, you guys are awesome, and the continued support inspires me to continue writing and churning out these chapters. Just one more month before supergirl comes back and we can get some more beautiful kalex scenes. Shout out to you guys and until next time!

**xxx**

It’s much too soon. Months too soon, really, but to deny the signs is a fool’s errand and Alex Danvers is anything but a fool. Dark brows knit together in a furrow as Alex scowls down at her heat cycle calendar, calculating the numbers in her head for what seems like the hundredth time as she tries to make sense of the reality that is incoming. She growls, her hands curling around her phone until her muscles creak.

Heat is cyclical, traceable, predictable. For teenagers, at least. It would be disastrous otherwise. Unscheduled heats and ruts occurring during the school year would lead to a slew of problems that even the government would not be able to contain without resorting to drastic measures. Spikes in pregnancies for one thing. A lack of focus in students, another. 

Government sanctioned suppressants forced the cycles into something manageable, staved off the frequency of indiscriminate patterns. By law, people weren’t even allowed to go off medication before they hit 20. Colleges have expelled students over the discovery, jobs have been lost because of it. Alex finds it a reasonable rule, one she is more than happy to follow even after she hits the approved birthing age. She has goals she strives to accomplish and refuses to let her biology dictate the course of her life. Mating is off the table until she at least finishes graduate school. Alex won’t give into urges that will cloud her judgment. She tolerates the heat sickness and cramps to the best of her abilities, determined to suffer through it. Better that than to lose herself panting after a knot. 

Structure gives way to discipline. Alex’s heat generally occurs four times a year, every six months.Twice in the sixth month, ranging from 1-3 days. Her last heat had been three and a half months ago. Nearly four. She remembers because it had been right before she and Kara had started to get closer. 

Alex recalls curling up into a ball of misery in their room as she fell into a restless sleep. When she awoke hours later that same day, she did so sweaty and heatsick. Eyes glassy and unfocused. It had taken a moment to notice the bowl sitting on the counter next to her bed. When she peered closer to look at the contents, she had been bemused to find that it contained several scoops of her favorite ice cream. The outside of the bowl had been cool to the touch, the ice cream unmelted despite having sat there for God knows how long. Beside it, a glass of water and a bottle of omega strength medication for the pain. Her parents had been away at a conference at the time so Alex knew it had to have been Kara. Despite the fact that they had barely exchanged more than a couple of sentences to one another, that simple consideration had spoken volumes of the depths of Kara’s compassion.

Frowning, Alex shakes herself loose of the memory with a long, drawn out sigh. She pinches the space just above her nose as she reflects on her feelings from the last few days. The signs had all been there. The heightened awareness of alpha scents, the steady increase of arousal, the honeyed lilt to her voice. The fog that made it hard to think. She had been aware of instances of suppressants failing, but it had never happened to her before. 

Overachiever she may be, this is one accomplishment she had hoped to curtail. 

She chews on the corners of her mouth as she considers her options. There isn’t much one can do when their heat or rut cycle is thrown off balance. Once it started, that was it. She’d have to skip school for a few days, which is fine. She can afford to miss without it affecting her GPA. Plus, her mom was on a business trip, leaving Jeremiah in charge, and her father is much more reasonable when it came to these sort of things. The only thing she’d really have to be mindful of is her time at home. It’s different now that she and Kara are closer. She can’t pinpoint why exactly, but instinctively she  _ knows. _

Alex frowns. She’ll have to stay away from Kara until she can figure out when her heat is actually starting. Well, not that it will be particularly difficult given that Kara had made it a point to stay away from  _ her.  _ Alex bites down on her bottom lip hard at the thought. Intrusive, pervasive, ugly little parts that slither along the whole of her heart. 

She hastily clicks out of the tracking app and opens up her messages to type out a quick text. The seconds tick by until another text pops up in confirmation. Alex is on her bike and out the door, not even a full minute after.

**x**

“You know, I think I’ve seen you more the last two weeks than I have in two months, Alex.” 

The comment pulls Alex’s attention from the novel in front of her to the smiling face of her best friend Alex regards Vicki silently, internally noting that while the statement may have been said in jest, the concern around it was real. 

Pricklings of guilt splinter through her and Alex draws up from her slouch to meet the eye of perplexed grays, “True,” she pauses, flicking her tongue along her lips absently. The last few months have been a blur. “I’ve been a bit...” Alex chews on the corner of her mouth as she thinks of how to describe what it’s like to be with Kara. She would liken it to drowning, in a way. Without the ache to her lungs or the longing to escape. Suffused in warmth, light, and affection. She flushes a tad before settling on a simple, “distracted.” 

Vicki scratches at her temple as she leans back in her chair, the leather squeaking faintly under her weight, “that’s one way to put it,” she comments lazily, “Any particular reason why you and Kara haven’t been joined at the hip lately?”

Alex huffs at the reminder and presses her back into the wall, “Kara’s just been busy. She's probably hanging out with that omega Kenny Li right now,” she mutters sullenly, picking at the tear of her jeans, “she’s barely had any time for me.”

“Ahh, I see,” Vicki snickers as she sits up, planting both feet on the ground dramatically, “So the reason you’ve been all moody is cause Kara’s finally made a new friend-”

“I have  _ not  _ been  _ moody! _ ” Alex cuts in indignantly. 

“Oh, you  _ so _ have, Alex,” Vicki shakes her head with a chuckle, “Man, all that bitching you did in the beginning about not having a social life cause you had to babysit your foster sister,” a sly grin stretches the corners of Vicki’s mouth, “seems a little silly in hindsight now, huh?” she says with sardonic cheer.

Alex’s cheeks warm as her past words are thrown back in her face, “Shut up, don't remind me of that,” an uncomfortable feeling of bitterness spreads through her chest, “I don’t even know why I came over here,” she grouses, covering her face with a pillow, “you can be such a jerk sometimes.”

Vicki laughs a bit at that, “C’mon, it’s a little funny,” she says, grin softening into a fond smile, “besides, I’m  _ your  _ jerk. Gotta get the shots in while I can, who knows when the next time we hang out will be.”

There’s a resigned quality to Vicki’s words that takes out all the fight in Alex and she has to swallow around a sudden lump in her throat, the guilt from earlier returning tenfold, “I-I’m sorry I’ve been such a shitty friend, Vic.”

A shadow briefly shades Vicki’s features before she’s blinks and clicks her tongue in faux disapproval, “You know you’ll always be my very best, Ally,” she counters patiently.

The warmth that blossoms in Alex’s chest lightens the pressure from before and she has to lower her gaze to hide the shy smile that slowly inches its way up her face. 

It’s nice that despite everything they can still have this. 

Friendships between alphas and omegas were difficult to maintain without boundaries being overstepped. That was especially true of her and Vicki. They had been each other’s firsts. Both only 15 at the time, but longing to try it when their cycles had lined up. 

Vicki had been soft until she was hard, gentle with her despite tethering on the edge of full rut. It felt good, but the want had also been confusing, overwhelming Alex to the point of tears. 

She had been a mess afterwards, crying piteously for long moments even as Vicki dropped kisses to her face and stroked her hair. Vicki had been so kind to her, even going as far as to say that she’d buy Alex jolly ranchers for a year if Alex promised not to tell anyone that she had been so bad that she had made her cry. The joke had been enough to pull a laugh from Alex, and they hugged, and spent the rest of the night cuddled up in bed watching TV. They had even tried dating but had both agreed that they worked better as friends and slipped back into those perspective roles with an ease that could only come from years of knowing someone inside and out. 

Alex tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear and clears her throat, “Um, so, how are things with Steph?” she asks conversationally, tapping at her thigh with a pen.

The moment dissipates, and Vicki starts in on her favorite subject with a gusto, talking about her girlfriend with the love and reverence that Alex hopes to one day find for herself. She’s not exactly fond of Stephanie, mostly because Stephanie isn’t fond of  _ her _ , but she’s happy to talk about her if it means making Vicki happy. 

Halfway through, Vicki unceremoniously switches the conversation to a longstanding one Dude, I’m legit about to kick Landace’s bitch ass out, he’s causing so many problems,” Vicki growls as she lays back into the bed next to Alex, “Luke was yelling at me cause he caught Landace bothering one of the omegas in his pack,” she sniffs, “why did I ever agree to be pack leader, it’s such a hassle.”

Alex rolls her eyes at her best friends whining. She reaches down to tug playfully at Vicki’s nose, “You  _ fought  _ for the right to be leader to keep your knothead brother from being in charge,” she reminds her with a raised brow, “which I’m forever grateful for, by the way,” Alex frowns, “I don’t think I’d even be a part of this pack if he was leader. He’s  _ awful  _ even without all that power getting to his head.”

“C’mon, Alex, Jensen’s not  _ that  _ bad,” Vicki protest weakly, blonde brows furrowing together in concentration, “he’s just… I mean, well...” she sighs a little, “yeah, no, you’re right. I know you’re right,” she presses the bottom of the palm of her hand against her eye, “It’s not his fault though, Alex. You remember how things were before.”

“I do remember. Vividly,” Alex says, moving the textbook out of the way to settle in next to Vicki before reaching over to gently poke her in the arm, “I know some siblings have this weird compulsion to defend each other, regardless of who is at fault. I get it, for the most part. That’s how I am with Kara,” she licks her lips, chewing on her next words before forcing out the reality of the situation, “but you grew up with the same monster in your house.”

“Ally…”

“No, shh,” Alex adds a hint of teasing to her tone to dispel the fog circling around them, “Quiet down now, Victoria, let the enlightened one speak,” Alex giggles when Vicki smacks her in the face with a pillow before grabbing at it so she can toss it to the side. Her nose wrinkles, “Rude.”

Gray eyes roll up in annoyance, “Get to the point, Danvers.”

“Maybe if you stop_ interrupting, _I could get to it.” Alex replies back cheekily, smirking wryly at Vicki’s answering scowl. Her expression shifts back into something serious, “Vicki, you’re probably one of the best people I know,” she continues, “You are good and you are _kind. _You’re not like your brother or father. ” Alex turns on her back and they lay together quietly, lost in the memories of a horror that lingers from the past.

“You know,” Alex breaks the silence after a moment, “it’s not just alpha’s like you that are few and far between. It’s people too,” she looks over at Vicki then, “Jensen is a fucking psychopath, Vic. It’s okay to be honest with me at least.”

Vicki frowns, holding Alex’s gaze before returning her eyes to the ceiling. “I know, Alex,” she murmurs with a sigh, lifting an arm to cover her face, “I know.”

**x**

When she makes it home, it's late. Later than she’s used to being out. Alex is nothing if not punctual and her adherence to the curfew her parents had put in place is proof of that. She figures it’s fine though. If Kara can stay out all hours of the night with other omegas then- she bites down on that thought before it can fully form, sinks her teeth into it, rips it from it stead with a sigh. 

Alex sets her bike against the side of the garage, letting down the kickstand to further reinforce its frame before bending over to run her fingers along the front tire. It may be time to refill it with air. Humming, she stands and stretches her legs out before starting a slow jog up the long strip of pavement leading to her house. Alex’s twirls her keys around her index finger as she opens the screen door with a free hand and unlocks the door to the back. 

Squinting, she steps inside the house only to falter in her gait when she notices a small light coming from the middle of the room. A low chuckle escapes her as she makes her way over to the source, knowing that there’s only one person who would be rummaging through the fridge at 11PM.

Resting her arm against the top of the fridge door, Alex sets a palm on her hip as she looks down to see wind blown blonde hair. Kara’s lean form is bent low as her foster sister rifles through the bottom drawer, looking for God knows what. 

Alex knows that Kara has to know she’s there but regardless, she makes a show of clearing her throat in order to draw Kara’s attention to her. 

“What's up, alien girl?” 

Kara’s head tilts towards her and Alex’s breath catches when she meets bright, curious eyes. It still takes her by surprise sometimes, how deep the blues run. Alex straightens along with Kara as her foster sister stands at her full height. She holds back a smile when she sees the ends of a sandwich hanging haphazardly from Kara's mouth.

"Alex!" Kara says in a muffled tone, grinning cheerfully around the bread. 

Alex laughs at the display of childlike glee and shakes her head fondly, "Finish your food before talking, Kara."

Pale lips curl down in a pout before Kara grabs the back of her sandwich and shoves the rest of it in her mouth. 

Alex doesn't know whether to be grossed out or impressed as Kara swallows it in one go but she does find herself chuckling when she sees the look of content that passes over her foster sisters face when Kara finishes. Food may be the only thing on Earth that Kara loves unequivocally. 

“Alex,” Kara repeats as she licks away the remnants of her sandwich from her fingers before leaning forward to set her chin on the arm Alex has set on top of the fridge door, “you’re finally home,” she murmurs, reaching over to brush her other hand along Alex’s side before gripping it in a firm hold. 

The gentle pressure applied to her hip makes Alex’s heart skip and heat to pool to her stomach. She goes to speak only to falter when blue eyes darken and a hint of ire enters Kara's gaze only for it to disappear a moment later. 

"Hm," Kara’s head tilts as her palm falls away, "Did you have a nice time at Vicki's?" 

There's an underlying of  _ something _ in Kara's voice that Alex can't place. Be it the timbre of it, a mix of highs and lows, probing in that alien way that Kara hasn't fully learned to turn off. Alex doesn't know why, but she can't help thinking that the question borders an accusation. She doesn't know why Kara is even asking given that her foster sister has never expressed any interest in her social life before. Sure, she’ll listen if Alex is upset or annoyed and offer tentative advice on the situations but she’s never outright  _ asked.  _ But maybe it has more to do with the fact that they’ve spent most of their free time together since they’ve gotten close. There hasn’t been any room for anyone else, no space taken when all that existed was each other. Now there’s Kenny, and there's always been Alex's friends, but it's different now. 

Still, Alex finds herself resenting the question. She glowers, just a bit, "I'm sure it was about as much fun as your time with Kenny," she replies cooly, keeping her gaze steadily locked with Kara's even as Kara flinches.

A crinkle appears above her foster sisters nose.

“Right,” Kara mumbles, raising a hand to rub at the space between her brows, expression contemplative,  _ sad _ , "right." 

A heavy silence springs up between them as they both glare at their feet. Seconds tick by, and with it grows Alex’s discomfort at the fact that Kara can smell Vicki on her the same way she can usually smell Kenny, though thankfully she can't find a trace of him on Kara today. The relief she feels at that fact makes her uncomfortable. When did it become like this? The subtle accusations, the uneasiness that lingers between them, the swirl of anxiety and doubt that stifles their movements. She hates it. 

More than anything she wants to fix this, but she doesn’t know how to go about untangling the mess of issues they’ve found themselves in.

A shower would be good, for a start. 

Exhaling shakily, Alex reaches up to run a palm back through her hair, “I'm all sweaty and gross from biking over here," she mumbles, wrapping her arms around herself self-consciously, like somehow that would dampen Vicki’s scent, "I think I'm going to wash up,"

“Okay, good. That’s good,” Kara gives a jerky nod, the speed behind it almost unseen, inhuman. She gingerly presses at the refrigerator door before shoving her hands in her pockets, “See you upstairs.” She’s gone before it can fully close. 

“Yeah,” Alex sighs as she stares after the lingering shimmers in the air, stomach gnawing and twisting uneasily.

**x**

The shower does wonders in clearing her head. Fog permeates the air as Alex opens the glass door, the haze misting the mirror beside her. She lets out a small sigh as she dries off before wrapping the towel around herself. Alex looks around the room vacantly, a spark of annoyance going through her when she realizes that in her haste to wash Vicki’s scent off of her, she forgot to bring a change of clothes.

Cursing to herself, Alex takes another breath as she rubs at her eyes, deliberating on whether or not it would be easier to just walk into her room like this or to suck it up and ask Kara to bring her a change of clothes. 

After debating on it for a moment, Alex decides on the latter, and clears her throat before speaking, “Kara,” she starts softly, knowing Kara will be able to hear her despite the low tone, “I forgot my pajamas. Can you please bring me something to wear?”

There’s no answer, not that she really expected one, and Alex turns to the mirror to give herself a quick once over. Though for what reason, she’s not entirely sure. The answers edges on the corners of her mind, but before she can dwell on it any further, she hears a knock at the door.

Alex adjust the towel before walking over and opening it a crack. 

“It’s just me,” Kara says, a goofy smile twisting her mouth as she peers into the small slit, “Jeremiah’s asleep,” she adds after a second, probably chalking Alex’s hesitance up to not wanting her father to see her half naked. 

Frowning, Alex considers asking for Kara to slip the clothes through the crack of the door before rolling her eyes at herself. That was a tad dramatic, even for her. She opens the door fully and before she can talk herself out of it, reaches forward to tug at ends of Kara’s shirt. 

Kara’s only response is to chuckle as she allow herself to be pulled into the bathroom. Their sides brush as Alex shuts the door behind her before looking up at her foster sister uncertainly, “Thanks, Kar,” she murmurs as she sets her palm on Kara’s stomach, fingers fiddling with the cloth of the shirt absently.

“Mhm.”

Alex squirms as Kara’s eyes trail over her form lazily, an appreciative glint reflected in pools of blue. She bite her lip at the way Kara’s gaze lingers on her legs for a moment before it shifts to the side. Kara expression grows sheepish. “No problem, Alex,” Kara cautiously holds out the folded bundle towards her. 

Nodding a little, Alex releases Kara’s shirt to reach down and grab at the clothing on top of the pile. Her brow rises when she sees the familiar faded letters of Kara’s favorite sweatshirt. Alex glances up at Kara questioningly, but Kara seems content to stare off to the side with a muted expression, completely avoiding her gaze.

Her throat feels thick as she steps back and angles away. Alex drops her towel then, ears warming when she hears a sharp intake of air before she hastily tugs the sweater over her head. It ends at the tops of her thighs, draping over her frame comfortably. 

She doesn’t bother with the rest of her clothing, choosing instead to bend down to pick up the discarded towel and fold it over her arm. The palm of Kara’s hand settles low on her back after she straightens from her crouch, stilling any further movements. 

Lashes fluttering, Alex finds herself drawn into Kara’s sturdy frame as a warm nose gently nudges at her temple, “Better.” Kara starts with a calming sigh, brushing strands of wet hair behind a reddening ear, “You smell like my Alex again,” she points out quietly, a note of happiness entering her voice.

It’s so sweet and unexpected and unabashedly Kara that Alex can’t help the haze of affection that washes over her. Before she realizes what she’s doing, she turned around so she can bury herself in Kara’s warmth.

“I hate that you've been so busy,” Alex admits in a breathy murmur, lifting up to press a tender kiss to Kara’s throat, and nuzzle along her neck, "Can you stay home with me tonight?" a soft exhale urges her to push further into Kara’s frame, “Please, Kara?” A needy little whine slips out unintentionally, her voice lifting in a pleading lilt. 

Maybe on some other night she’d find her behavior embarrassing, humiliating even, to show those delicate omega parts of herself. Her pride normally wouldn’t stand for it. But right now she can’t find it in her to care. Alex recognizes that she’s not above begging to get what she wants. Especially not with the way that Kara’s breath hitches and soft fingers splay and dig into her waist possessively, bruising in their intent.

Spirals of red darken Kara’s eyes as she tugs Alex into her roughly, “Anything you want, Alex,” she promises earnestly, a hint of desperation edging her tone, “anything.”

Warmth settles low in Alex’s stomach at the force behind the action as she finds herself locked in place.. 

As Kara trails gentle kisses along her jaw, Alex has the fleeting thought that she wouldn’t mind breaking if Kara was the one to pick her apart. 

Her head grows foggy with arousal. The implication there isn’t lost to her. Maybe it’s been a slow burn, a step by step culmination of a deliberate ignorance of wants, but she can't pretend this isn't what it is. As an appealing growl starts to rumble in Kara’s chest, Alex realizes just how far she’d be willing to take things if Kara was amenable.

With the way Kara presses into her, so hot, and solid, movements keen and eager, Alex knows Kara would be.

She swallows, dizzy from shame and heat, and  _ want  _ at the feeling of Kara hard against her, hard  _ because  _ of her. _ _ Hard and thick and aching  _ for  _ her.

All those times Kara pulled away from her in the past playback in her head and everything starts to make sense. The distance, the surge of anxiety, the sudden possessive streak. Alex's flushes as she feels herself clench on nothing, turned on at the thought that Kara has been hard for her this entire time.

Her heart races as her mind fills with various scenarios of Kara acting on the claim she had staked on Alex. She imagines Kara pressing her into the bathroom wall. Kara lifting up the sweater drenched in her scent to find Alex bare and wet for her, ready to be spread and knotted. Kara fucking her slick with cum, _ breeding _ her like some whore and Alex- Alex letting it happen. She  _ wants  _ it to happen. 

Oh.

"Alex,” Kara’s eyes widen at the pained exhale, the red hue draining from them like blood dripping down a wall, “you're crying,” she points out tentatively, pale brows knitting together in a frown. She gently cups the sides of Alex’s face, "Are you hurt? Did I hurt you?" she asks, gaze wandering over Alex intently, checking for injuries where there are none.

A watery chuckle falls from Alex's mouth as she sets her palms on the back of Kara's hands and hold them against her face. She sniffs, shaking her head a little before leaning forward to rest her temple on Kara's chest. 

“No,” Alex whispers, “you didn’t hurt me.”

Kara's arms wind around her protectively then and Alex can't help but shudder as the action does nothing to stave off her arousal. She shivers as she buries her face further into Kara, attempting to take comfort in the scent, but only the needy parts of her respond as the ache to be filled strengthens. 

Overwhelmed, she presses insistently at Kara’s chest, simultaneously relieved and disappointed when Kara lets her go without a fight, even going as far as to move several steps back to give Alex space to breathe. Alex wipes at her eyes piteously as she turns away. 

_ Pathetic  _ she thinks, miserable in a way she hasn’t been in months

"I didn’t mean for you to find out,” Kara grumbles unhappily, falling in on herself as dejection colors her tone, “I’m sorry, Alex.”

“No, no it's fine," Alex says, biting her lip as her anxiety peaks,. “ _ We’re _ fine, I-” she wrings her hands together as she shuffles her feet and lets out an anxious little laugh, “I’m going into heat again,” she admits after a moment, figuring it would be best to just put all the cards on the table if there was any chance to resolve this. 

“Yeah,” Kara licks her lips, a contrite smile darkening her features, “that’s probably my fault. My rut is starting soon.”

“Oh,” Alex’s nose scrunches up, her eyes narrowing in annoyance, though it’s more directed at the situation as a whole and not at Kara herself, “well, why didn’t you tell me?” she huffs, running a shaky palm back through her hair, “that seems like a vital piece of information, Kara!”

“It's _ embarrassing _ , Alex,” Kara’s cheeks flush a vibrant red as she gestures frantically towards the general vicinity of her groin, “You try dealing with random boners popping out of nowhere like ‘hey, guess what, you’re hard now, congrats!’ Out of _ nowhere,  _ Alex!”

Alex’s gaze flicks down before shooting back up after she notices how Kara’s dick still strains against the fabric of her sweats. She swallows thickly, the sight reminding her that her arousal hasn’t dampened at all since they started talking about  _ this _ .

“God, so, all those times you ran out of the room it was t-to, what, jerk off or something,” a faint note of hysteria enters her voice as she tries to wrap her head around the fact that she hadn’t realized what was happening until this very moment.

“I don’t  _ do  _ that,” Kara sputters, stumbling backwards in an uncharacteristic show of clumsiness, “I just, I just wait for it to go away and-” she snaps her mouth shut, jaw straining before she glares down at the ground.

A sharp feeling of guilt stings Alex’s chest at the reaction. She covers her face with both of her hands and lets out a tired sigh, “I’m sorry, that was so shitty of me to say,” Alex mumbles before dropping her hands to her sides, “I didn’t mean to make it sound like a bad thing, it’s not like I’ve never-" she swallows the words, speech failing her. 

Kara palms the back of her neck awkwardly at the almost confession, “yeah,” she blows a strand of her hair out of her face with a quick exhale, “broke the sound barrier trying to leave after I realized what you were doing.”

“Oh, that’s-” Alex bites her lip, the knowledge that Kara had heard her when she was masturbating only serving to fuel the heat burning inside of her. She clears her throat a few times, "well, is there any particular reason why you don't…?" she curls her fingers into a fist and makes an up and down motion, the implication behind the gesture obvious. 

"Rao, give me strength," Kara rolls her eyes  _ hard, _ "things  _ break  _ when I lose control, Alex," she points out petulantly, arms crossed in a tight hold.

"Right, yeah, that," Alex's brow furrows as she raises a finger to her chin, "that makes sense," she mumbles almost to herself. 

They both fall silent after that and then Kara sighs and looks over to Alex hesitantly, taking a few steps towards her until they can feel the heat of each other's bodies, "Can we please just finish talking about this in the morning, Alex? I just-" her expression twists forlornly, "I just want to hold you and-and go to sleep, now, okay? Please? I've missed you so much." 

Alex's heart aches at the small plea. She nods and finds herself draped in Kryptonian warmth once more. 

Kara starts to carefully run her fingers through Alex’s hair, a shudder going through her, “thank you."

"Anything for you," Alex responds shakily as Kara's hold marginally tightens. Alex wraps her arms around Kara's neck as Kara lifts her bridal style and floats them over to their room. But even as Kara murmurs to her that everything will be okay, Alex still can’t help feeling that she might just be a fool afterall.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

“You know, Alex, uh, not that I really mind, but, um, are you going to put on any pants any time soon?”

“Just go to bed, Kara.”

“Alright, no need to get snippy, I was just asking, jeez.”

“Mhm. Love you, star girl.”

“Love you, too, Alex.”

**x**


	5. Chapter 5

**xxx**

Calm. Steady_. Breathe._

A mantra in her head. Kara lies still, flat on her back, her eyes following the motion of the ceiling fan as it rotates slowly. A gentle gust of wind brushes along the skin of her arm. Barely felt. Noticeable only by the way Alex shivers and burrows further into her.

The palm of her hand slips along the plane of Alex’s back before drifting further down, just above her foster sisters ass, and up again. Repititous. Alex sighs in the hollow of her neck, soft lips brushing against her throat. Kara swallows then, ears warming every time Alex’s thigh accidentally brushes against her length. Anxiety does nothing to tame the ache. 

Alex shifts to the side, temple resting on her shoulder. Kara lowers her gaze to find Alex looking up at her intently, a note of conflict shading brown eyes. Her brows furrow as she takes Alex in. 

Her foster sister is pretty lashes and fair skin; dewy eyes alight with affection, dark with want.

She lets out a small sigh, palms herself over her sweats briefly. A flush spreads along her chest as she hurries to readjust so she’s not pressing so eagerly into Alex’s thigh. Kara freezes when Alex’s fingers brush along the back of her hand. 

“How long?” Alex asks in a breathy murmur, gaze adrift. Kara doesn’t know how to answer that. How long  _ what?  _ How long has Kara wanted this, wanted _ her _ ?

A while.

Eyes fluttering, Kara exhales, torn asunder. Perhaps Alex’s question pertains more to herself? There’s no way Kara wouldn’t have noticed. Her foster sisters scent constantly permeates the air. Sweet, and enticing, and so, so wet. Never an invitation though. Never an intentional tease. Kara swallows again. 

How long has  _ Alex  _ wanted this without knowing? 

Longer still. 

Her shoulders lift in a half shrug. It's not a proper answer and Alex makes her disapproval known by tapping Kara’s nose. 

Kara keeps her eyes locked with Alex’s as she curls her hand delicately around her foster sisters wrist, thumbing the rapidly thrumming pulse point. "I don’t know what you want me to say, Alex," she replies softly, frown in place, “Does it matter how long?”

_ When nothing is going to happen.  _ The last of it is implied. 

A contemplative expression crosses Alex’s face as she considers Kara’s words. Kara waits, patient and longing. She wants this conversation to end, wants Alex to just go to sleep so she can hold her and pretend for a few hours that she hadn’t completely screwed up their relationship with this. 

So when Alex attempts to pull away, Kara holds fast, wraps her foster sister up firmly. “Nothing has to change, Alex,” Kara promises, a tremor to her voice, “I-I don’t want  _ that  _ from you,” she says in a harsh whisper. It’s not completely a lie. It’s not just sex for her, but how can she even begin to broach the subject of wanting more? Relationships on Kryton were different. She was never supposed to have a choice. Mostly she just hates the idea of Alex intentionally shying away from her out of fear. Kara never wants Alex to think she’d degrade her like that. The thought makes her chest ache.

Kara slips her hand through dark hair as she gently cradles the back of her foster sister’s neck, “I’d never do anything to hurt you, Alex,” her throat hitches a bit, eyes falling shut, "I love you."

A sigh brushes along her ear before Alex angles back to press a sweet kiss to her jaw. "I know, Kara,” Alex responds quietly, fingers tightening in the fabric of her shirt as she hugs her closer, “I know.”

**x**

To say everything is fine between them would be a lie. 

That doesn’t stop Alex from saying it. 

If she repeats it to herself and Kara enough times, maybe the lie around the tension between them will take shape. No longer formless and abstract. A solid foundation of belief. 

Boundaries are put in place.  _ Just until our cycles are done, Kara  _ she promises, her voice soothing as she works to reassure her foster sister that it’s only for a little while, that she needs the reassurance of Kara’s touch just as much as Kara needs hers, that Kara isn’t alone in wanting them to be okay. 

Kara’s only reply is a narrowing of eyes, a pensive expression in place. Muted in tone as she gives her assent to Alex’s pleading. 

Intense gazes are shifted, no longer left to linger and appraise. Meaningful queries are put on pause. A facade of normalcy. Alex can do this, at least. Protect her foster sister in this way. Keep their bond untethered to societal expectations. Pretend that things are  _ fine, good, great _ . Avoidance is not so easy. How can it be when they live together, their scents constantly mixing. 

Kara’s pull is gravitational; she can’t help falling into her. Just a little further each time. She indulges in the comfort of Kara’s arms for short moments only to draw herself away. Alex knows Kara hates it. Her alien girl, always so polite. Mindful of Alex’s wishes, respectful of the distance Alex puts in place, but unable to hide the displeasure that shades her features every time Alex pushes her away. 

_ It’s better this way  _ Alex thinks with a sigh, slumping forward in her chair. Her cheek presses into the wood of her desk as she gazes over to the rumbled comforter on Kara’s bed. A flush warms her cheeks when she remembers how hard Kara had been against her as she was held down in bed. Only to sleep, but  _ still _ . 

Temptations race around every corner. Alex raises a finger to her mouth, tracing her lips absently. She’s not sure if Kara has noticed it, but the scent around her foster sister has changed. Kara radiates strength and heat. Dominance. Calls for submission, a bending of wills. Alex shivers, her stomach coiling as shame follows the want. Years of careful consideration thwarted in only a few months. 

To be reduced to a shivering, wanting, thing. She’s sick about it. 

_ If only I wasn’t an omega _ . A fanciful thought. 

Kara has already lost so much and still, Alex thinks to take more. She’s aware of how her foster sister feels about the system humanity has set in place. Knows how Kara finds the ache distasteful, how she hates the way alphas and omegas pant after one another, desperate for a cunt to sink into, for a knot. Kara had made it clear that she doesn’t actually want  _ her _ . They’re lost in a swell of hormones that neither of them can even begin to control. 

There’s nothing more to it. Alex’s squeezes her eyes shut. She hates how much that thought hurts, but it doesn’t come as a surprise. The idea of Kara being attracted to her is an unfathomable one. Alex knows she’s pretty by this societies standards, but pretty for a human cannot begin to measure up to genetically engineered perfection. 

Really, the distance can only help. She can control herself as well. Nothing has to change.

Alex is good at lying.

**x**

It comes sooner than expected. 

Alex stumbles her way through her classes in a daze, half out of it. Completely unaware of the alpha stares trailing along her back. She sways at her locker, heatsick and nauseated, fingers shaking as she grasps at the lock. She considers calling her father, taking leave for the day. An unpleasant smell pulls her from her thoughts. 

“Danvers, Danvers, Danvers.” Alex’s eyes close at the call of her name, annoyance warming her blood. Jensen lets out a long whistle as he stops beside her, “Now this is certainly a surprise,” he leans in close, completely obscures her view of the few students who stand whispering to one another in the hallway. “Inviting the whole school for a taste?” 

Alex’s nose wrinkles, disgust roiling through her stomach. Kara’s rut had done more than trigger an early heat for her. She now finds the scent of other alphas unappealing. Dull even. A change. No longer aching for any knot to fill her. Just the one. Alex shifts, but does not feel herself grow wet. Not when Jensen looms beside her. 

There’s a dark intent swirling in his scent. Like spider legs dancing along her skin. 

She continues fiddling with the lock, barely sparing him a glance. “Leave me alone, Jensen,” she says, tone bored and unaffected. A show of confidence when there is none.

Jensen ignores her request, “C’mon, Alex,” he sneers, voice taking on a caustic edge, “we both know what you need right now.”

Alex scowls at the implication, feels her anger rising from the pit it resides. She turns a glare to Jensen, “God, you’re  _ such _ an knothead,” she huffs, irritation lacing the words, “too stupid to accept when someone doesn’t want you and pathetic enough to keep trying.”

It’s absolutely the wrong thing to say. Rage flashes in his eyes, brief and searing before she feels a pressure on the back of her neck. A demand to submit. Off limits, not to be touched by anyone except for your mate. She swallows when his fingers dig into her skin.  _ How many times do I have to tell you to be careful around alphas _ ? Her mother’s disapproval rings in her head, heavy with exasperation. 

“You think you’re better than me,  _ omega _ ?” he hisses, squeezing the back of her neck, unwilling to let her get away, “think you're so above the call when you’re nothing more than a whore. I  _ heard _ you that night. Came home right in the middle of you giving it up to Vicki. It was hot, Alex. Finally put in your place, begging and moaning for an alpha cock like the breeding bit-”

“ _ Enough. _ ”

Jensen’s grip loosens and Alex doesn’t hesitate to twist away from him, almost to the point of tripping. Her descent is stilled by a familiar touch. Relief tightens Alex’s throat as Kara’s scent washes over her, soothing the fear that curls her gut. 

Alex shudders, falling back into her foster sisters front. She grasps at the hold on her waist, fingers shaking. Doesn’t dare speak Kara’s name, knowing her voice will crack if she tries. 

Instead she focuses on the scene before her. 

There Vicki stands, squeezing Jensen’s wrist so hard Alex can hear the joints creak. “You really are a vile little fuck, Jensen Donahue,” Vicki growls between clenched teeth, “I told you that Alex was_ off_ limits. Once again, you disobey a direct order from me.”

“Vic-”

“Do not speak my name, whelpling,” Vicki wrenches Jensen’s wrist near the point of breaking, ignoring her brothers whimpers of pain, “and listen well. When it comes to importance, your place is and will forever be below Alex. I will choose her over you  _ every  _ time,” she leans in closer, fangs bared, “Understood?”

Jensen’s eyes flash, but there’s not much he can do. Once you vow yourself to an alpha, nothing short of blood can break the hold they have on you. A packleader’s call for submission is powerful. Jensen grits his teeth and presents his neck, a show of surrender, “Yes, Alpha.”

Vicki stares Jensen down for a long moment before her gaze softens and flickers over to Alex, “Ally…”

“It’s fine, I’m fine,” Alex says quickly, heart spiking at the pitying looks thrown her way by the other students milling about the hallway. She hates being the center of attention, hates that it even had to come to this. “You can let him go, I’m good now."

Behind her, Kara tenses, though the hand on her hip remains pliant. Steady but malleable, allowing for easy escape. Alex swallows, just now noticing that her foster sister has yet to utter a word. She hesitates a second before looking up and bites her lip when she sees a muted expression. Kara’s face remains unmoving.

Living marble.

Alex reaches behind her to grip her foster sisters shirt. “I think I’m going to head out, Vic,” she gives Vicki a small smile, “Can you talk to my teachers for me?”

Vicki pauses, a tilt to her head. Her gaze bounces between Alex and Kara with a frown, "Of course," Vicki says after a moment, shaking the thoughts away. She raises two fingers, a wave goodbye before motioning her brother forward, an unspoken command. 

Alex stares after them until she's sure they're gone before she releases the breath she had unwittingly been holding. 

“Hey, star girl,” Alex murmurs, turning so she can press into Kara's side. She teases her fingers along the planes of Kara's stomach, “Take me home?” 

It’s a risk, what she’s asking; she can already feel a sickness slithering through her blood, leaving her weak in the knees,  _ aching  _ to crawl out of her skin. But the longing for comfort pulses heavy, leaving her reckless. She lowers her head to Kara’s collar, shivers at the tightening of cramps, her heat no longer dampened by the mix of alpha scents. 

A palm settles on the small of her back, touch gentle yet firm. She looks up to catch subtle burgundy eclipsing a dark gaze, “Yeah,” Kara breathes, reaching over to carefully brush her hair to the side, “Okay.”

.

.

.

.

.

"Hey, Alex." 

"Mm?"

"The next time Jensen puts his hands on you," Kara tone is conversational as she glances over at Alex with a wide smile, "I'm going to kill him.” 

The words send a chill up Alex's spine. She swallows, throat thick. Wrings her hands together as she returns her gaze to the winding road.

For once, arguments on morality and possible exposure lie silent on her tongue. 

x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for how long it has taken me to get this chapter out, Supergirl is literally sucking the life out of me LOL. This shit with Lena has left a very bad taste in my mouth and it's kind of draining my inspiration overall? Any-WAY, I hope you guys enjoyed this and if you did, please leave a comment below. Also check out my contribution to costia-gray's Bound to You series, really great stuff. Until next time.


	6. Chapter 6

**xxx**

The House of El is burning. 

Screams ring out amidst the fog. Kara views destruction through a blurred lens, mouth parting. The taste of dread is distinct. Unique. All its own. 

A bit like copper on the tongue. 

The void of space spreads throughout her limbs until she’s cold. And then there’s quiet. 

Memories flicker behind her eyelids at each blink as they make their way home. They don’t speak. Kara spends the majority of it brooding. She’s never quite felt like this before. Not the anger, no. The anger is a constant, though she hides it well. It brims beneath the surface, sticky and _ slick _, but not even the face of total ruin was able to inspire a rage like this. 

Blood mixes with the twinning of their scents. There are tiny cuts that lay uneven along the back of Alex’s neck. Byproducts of another alphas violation. Fear blends with the signs of heat. The smell makes her sick. Kara’s grip on the steering wheel tightens. The frame creaks under her hold. Her instincts flare and recede, caught in a constant state of flux. She’s stewing in a mess of emotions, veering towards the edge of a cliff called violence. 

The vow of passivity was broken in days past, Kryptonian values chipped away with each slight. The streets of Argo cared only for survival. The sin of murder, well, that was a House’s concern. The Guildless had no name to punish. The council left them to their own machinations. If a few of them disappeared, all the better. Her existence faded with the loss of her name.

Still, will Rao forgive her this? She’s come close, but had never crossed that line. The thought alone is enough of an offense. Her hands are stained in an unseen crimson. How deep will the color get? The love she has for Alex makes her question the last of the things she once considered right. There’s a part of her shrinking each passing day, her morals dissipating under the yellow sun. 

Kara wonders what Alex must think of her. She grimaces at the prospect. She pulls up to their garage and places the car in park, the motor churning as they sit idle. Alex fidgets and shifts beside her before clearing her throat. 

“Are you mad at me, Kara?” Her foster sisters voice comes out meek. A far cry from the self assured girl she’s come to call her own. Kara’s eye twitches at the possession she places on Alex’s name. Archaic proclivities creep beneath the surface. 

Frowning, Kara takes a moment to consider Alex’s question, not wanting to come off as too flippant. Eventually she settles into her feelings with a sigh. “No.” Kara’s inclines her head to the side. “Not at you.”

Alex bites her lip, brows knitting together at her response. “If I had known my heat would start today, I would’ve stayed home.” A shudder goes through the length of Alex’s body before she crosses her arms. “Not really a fan of every alpha in the vicinity panting after me.” She finishes in a bitter mumble. 

The frame of the steering wheel bends as Kara’s palm involuntarily contracts, the metal groaning under the strain. Alex glances over at her with a frown but doesn’t comment on her behavior. If anything, that makes it worse. 

Kara’s throat feels tight as the rage mounts. The word_ Mine _beats a steady rhythm in her head. She swallows as she gradually releases the wheel to lean back into her seat. “Maybe it would be better if I stayed out tonight,” she mumbles, eyes lowering in shame from her thoughts.

Alex seems to shrink at that, enticing scent in retreat. “Oh.” The furrow to her brown deepens. “Kara, I…” she pauses, a leaden tongue. Alex’s features morph into a grimace as she turns to Kara. "I'm sorry. It was selfish of me to ask you to take me home when I'm in heat. I know you don't—that I'm not-" Alex’s teeth snap together. "I'm just sorry."

Guilt gnaws at Kara's stomach at the pain that's written so clearly on her foster sisters face, feeling as though she's missing some key plot. She turns Alex’s words around in her head as she tries to work out the reasoning behind the apology. "You don’t have to apologize to me, Alex.” Kara watches the subtle shifts to Alex’s face as she speaks. “You didn’t do anything wrong. If anything, I should be the one apologizing.” Kara’s jaw clenches as another flush of anger goes through her. “It should have never gotten to that point with Jensen. I should’ve noticed something was wrong sooner.”

There’s a sheen to dark eyes as Alex shakes her head slowly. “That’s not your fault, Kara.”

“Well, it’s not yours either.” Kara scowls. “I should have protected you and I _ didn’t._" She should have done a lot of things. What kind of alpha is she to not have immediately put Jensen in his place? 

They wouldn't be in this mess if she had just made Alex hers months ago. 

Kara grits her teeth, fangs descending. She’s livid with her desire to claim. She should've fucked Alex the first time Alex's omega called for her, she should've, should've-

Kara bristles at the sudden stiffening in her jeans. Her mouth parts in a shaky exhale as the sensitive head of her cock grazes the cool metal of her zipper. The throb is almost insistent at this point. She digs her fingers into her legs, hands quivering as she breathes deeply through her nose. Kara tires of the pretense of doing what she must.

“You know, I keep telling myself that I have to be good,” she starts, voice low, “that I can’t be selfish with you because you deserve better than, than this _thing_-” She pats fitfully at her chest. “That tears at my insides.” Kara grips her shirt as she squeezes her eyes shut. “I love you, Alex. I love you so much that it hurts sometimes." She takes another breath. "How can I love you this much yet still want to make you take me?"

"_Kara_."

Kara bites her lip, refusing to look at the ruin she's left. _ Vile. _

Her parents would be appalled by the person she’s become.

Tears sting the corners of her eyes as she lowers her head. "I really am no better than a human alp-”

“That’s not true.” Alex is quick to cut her off, voice sharp. “You _ are _ better, Kara.” She leans over to envelop Kara’s hand in a fumbling hold. “You are. You know how much I hate being an omega. It’s-It's _ awful. _ Demeaning. There’s nothing worse." Alex's fingers shake as they grow taut. "But it’s different with you, Kara. You’re the only one who makes me feel that it is okay to want this."

Kara softens then, the tension easing. Her chest tightens at the fond look Alex levels her with. It’s as if the fog has been cut away, leaving dark eyes clear of heat. Transparent. A point of clarity reached.

"You're not a monster for the way you feel, Kara." Alex chews on the corner of her lip as she considers her words. "The things you want...I want them too."

“Alex…”

“I trust you.” Alex keeps her gaze steadily locked with Kara’s as she slides a palm along Kara's trembling thigh. "I trust you to take care of me.” She repeats, her eyes lowering to Kara's lap as her fingers brush along the bulge in Kara's jeans. "Is this okay?" Alex asks, staring back up at Kara hesitantly. She waits for Kara's slow nod before gingerly cups the outline of her cock. 

Kara's throat hitches as she involuntarily rocks up. "_Alex._" She hisses like she's been burned as Alex massages her gently. There's a sweet longing at the base of her groin as she swells up further. 

A flush spreads along pale cheeks. "You're _ so _ hard," Alex breathes, voice trembling. Her heart thumps heavy in Kara's ears as heat and slick once again permeate the air. 

Alex squeezes Kara’s length. "Let's go inside.”

The implication of Alex’s words is clear. 

Kara grits her teeth as she covers Alex's hand, stilling her movements. She shifts stiffly in her seat. “I don’t-” The scent of arousal makes it hard for her to think. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t.” Alex assures with a certainty that Kara can’t begin to understand. She goes to respond but falters as the dark of Alex’s eyes veers towards an abyss. 

“Besides," Alex gives a slow smile. "I wouldn’t mind breaking if it's for you, Kara."

**x**

"We have to be careful."

Fresh from a shower, Alex's skin is clean. _C__lear_. Free to once again be covered in Kara's scent. 

Kara sits on the edge of her bed, eyes dewy as she hazily stares up at her foster sister, who stands before her playing with the ends of her shirt. The whole of it hangs loosely off of Alex's shoulders, just long enough to barely cover the tops of her legs. Kara swallows. She doesn't think she'll ever tire of the sight of Alex in her clothing. 

"We can't have sex." Kara nods along slowly, though her focus is fixed on the curve of Alex's hips. Her mind goes foggy as Alex's palms rest on her shoulders and her foster sister straddles her lap. She doesn't know if it's the result of the heat, but Alex's weight registers clearly for once. 

"I don't want our first time together to be when I'm on my heat." Alex reaches down as she speaks, squeezing Kara's cock through her jeans once more. "I want it to be special." 

Kara grunts, breathing deeply through her nose as her palms slides up Alex's bare legs. She pushes her thumb into quivering thighs, kneading the skin there.

When Alex whimpers, Kara instinctively leans forward to drag her teeth gently along Alex's neck.

"Mm, I mean it, Kara," Alex sighs as she slips her fingers through silky blonde hair before gripping the back of Kara's neck. "You can't knot me." She urges Kara even closer. "Even if I beg." Alex whines as sharp teeth dig further in her neck. "_Especially _ if I beg because, fuck, Kara, I _ will_. I'll beg for it. I want you to fuck me, want your knot inside me." Her hips stutter as she starts grinding into Kara's lap. "Want you to knot me so much."

"Oh, Rao." Kara's eyes sting, her cock throbbing as it strains restlessly against the seam of her jeans, practically begging to be let out. "Rao, Alex." She releases a labored breath. "You're turning me on so much." Kara inches up to press a lingering kiss to Alex's jaw. After she's sufficiently calmed, she leans back to meet dark eyes. "I-I won't go inside." Her fingers graze Alex's inner thigh, near heat and slickness. "I promise." 

The smile Alex gives her is small, but warm, her face open and full of trust.

"We'll figure it out together, okay?" Alex's eyes go dark with affection. "I love you." 

Kara chest tightens as warmth blooms inside her heart. "I love you too, Alex." She says softly before shifting, feeling anxious. "Is it okay to kiss you now?" 

"Yeah, Kara." A smile eases the corners of Alex's mouth. "You can kiss me

**x**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but I hope you guys enjoy it. A set up for the coming chapters. Btw, how graphic are we thinking for next chap? Hm, I wonder.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solomon Grundy,  
Born on a Monday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a new chapter! Sorry guys, just reposting the old one. Working on the next 👋

**xxx**

"I know you haven't done this before." 

Kara's eyes flutter as gentle fingers brush through her hair, slide over her ear, down along her neck to push into her pulse point. 

"I'm gonna take care of you too, Kara." Alex's voice is soft as she cups Kara's cheeks, urging her to look up. Kara's breath catches at the love she can see reflected in dark eyes. "You're safe here with me."

**x**

The next two days pass in a haze of heat.

With Alex's parents gone for the weekend, there's nothing between them except a promise. They go from fumbling, awkward touches to rough and sticky embraces. 

The last few months have only served to act as a tease. 

Kara's throat is dry as she curls her fingers around her length, her hands finally steady after hours of Alex's palm guiding the way. She's well versed in this aspect now. Kara can't remember why she had been so hesitant before. How can anything that feels this good possibly be bad? 

She squeezes her length, mouth parting in a silent moan. Her cock throbs in time with Alex's heartbeat.

Gazing up from beneath her lashes, she huffs out a small laugh at her foster sisters lack of subtly. Alex does little to hide the fact that she's watching, following the motion of Kara's hands intently. 

Kara's eyes flutter as a groan hitches her throat. She periodically runs her palm along her foster sisters bare, quivering thighs, and up Alex's waist to drift underneath a dark t shirt and back again. 

She slides her fingers along the skin of Alex's waist before reaching behind to palm her foster sisters ass through thin sleep shorts. "I don't even know why you bother wearing these." Kara chuckles, carefully squeezing. "They never last." 

Kara gives a long suffering sigh as she tugs lightly. She tears through them with ease, grinning when Alex flushes and jerks into her. "Though I have a bit of an idea why." She misses, pulling at the rest of Alex's shorts until they're scraps and her foster sister lays bare and shivering against her. 

"I-I hope you enjoy your allowance going to my clothing bill from now on." Alex's grouches, her nose wrinkling in a show of annoyance. "We're going shopping as soon as my heat is done." 

A faint smile teases the edges of Kara's mouth. "Sure, baby." Kara murmurs, leaning forward to kiss the underside of Alex's jaw. "Whatever you want."

Dark lashes flutter as Alex's cheeks goes liquid beneath her touch. Her chest tightens at the sight. It's something she had taken note of the last few days--the way Alex folds into her arms at every show of affection. Her alpha preens at how eager Alex is to submit. 

_ Alex wants this. Wants me. _ Kara's cheeks go warm with pride, eyes softening. _ Me and no one else. _

Alex squirms in her lap then, arm winding around her back like she's the one who needs an anchor. "Anything I want?" Alex asks in a teasing whisper as she raises Kara's free hand to her mouth, pressing sweet kisses along the pads of her fingers before nipping at them with a sigh. 

Kara's eyes widen as she watches Alex guide two of her fingers in her mouth, shuddering as Alex begins to suck. She wonders how Alex's mouth would feel lower and jerks herself off faster to the thought. "Rao, Alex." Kara breathes as she spreads her fingers inside Alex's mouth. "You look so beautiful like this." 

Alex whimpers as she slides Kara's fingers further down her throat, holding them there. She rubs her palms along Kara's arms, digging into the flexing muscles. "Mmm." Alex releases Kara's fingers with a pop, expression hazy as she wraps her arms around Kara's neck so she can press their hips together. 

"Kara-" Alex shudders, arching up into Kara's lap so she can trap the hand Kara uses to jerk off between them. "You feel so good." She sighs in Kara's ear as her legs spread. "You make me want it so much." 

Kara grits her teeth then. All she feels is soft, wet, warmth. Everything is skirting between too much and not enough. The scent of Alex's arousal permeates the air and Kara breathes it in eagerly, fueled by the knowledge that her foster sister is just as turned on as she is.

She reaches down to spread Alex's pussy lips with a trembling finger. "Y-you want me in here?" She asks shakily, her thumb brushing against her foster sisters pulsing clit. "Want me to put my cock inside here?" 

Alex let's out a soft little moan as she pushes at Kara's hand. "_ Yes,_ Kara, I want it _ . _" 

Kara grabs hold of shifting hips with her wet hand and tugs Alex closer, encourages her foster sister to grind into her lap. Soft pussy lips spread along dick, smearing her, making her throb and ache. She jerks up. 

"Kara," Alex whines, fingers threading through her hair. "Stop teasing me." She tugs at her roughly, though the touch barely registers. The act alone is enough to make Kara's heart flutter. Another way Alex shows she wants it. 

"Put it inside me. Make me take your cock." 

There's a reason why that is a very bad idea but Kara is finding hard to remember. She massages Alex's ass for a moment before smacking it hard enough to leave a small bruise. Alex cries out, rocking back into her hold. She spanks her again. Kara knows how much of her strength Alex can take. Knows how much Alex longs for it, how much it turns her foster sister on when Kara leaves bruises on her skin.

Little reminders of Kara's touch, Kara's claim, of how much she belongs to Kara now. 

Kara growls as she lifts Alex with ease and pins her to the bed. She feels Alex's surprised gasp like a stroke to her dick. 

She breathes in the spike of arousal as she grips herself in a rough, shaky hold. Kara leans over to rub the head of her cock along Alex's bare stomach, smearing the smooth skin with her pre-cum. Kara jerks herself off at the thought of spilling all over Alex, inside of her, whenever Alex will let her.

Kara breathes in harshly, feeling feverish. "Gonna fuck you until you can't walk without feeling me."

It slips out without meaning to. 

Alex arches up into Kara with a sob, willingly spreading herself for Kara's cock. "oh, _ fuck._ Fuck, Kara, _ please_." 

Heady excitement quickens Kara's breath at her foster sisters reaction. 

"I'm gonna leave you sticky and wet," Kara mutters darkly as she rubs the length of her cock up and along her foster sisters slick pussy. "Gonna-gonna fucking breed you, Alex, pump you full of my cum_ -" _ her hips stutter as she pushes into Alex for a brief second. She's close to losing it. So close to just spreading Alex open and making her take it.

Kara can admit that there's a large, shameful part of her that wants Alex like this. That preens at the idea of holding her foster sister down, spreading her wide as she squirms and begs and pleads for the one thing that can offer a reprieve from her pain. The ache claws at her insides, longs to come out and fuck Alex slick until she's soaking wet, sticky from Kara's scent, ruined for anyone who would ever consider trying to take her away.

Her jaw aches. Kara lowers her palms to Alex's waist as she considers thrusting inside, giving into not only her wants, but Alex's as well. The sight of glassy eyes is the only thing that gives her pause. She sighs.

_ Not like this. _

Kara bites down on her tongue as wrestles with control just enough to keep it. She holds her breath as she pulls back.

Her cockhead twitches. Denied once again. Kara ignores appealing whines as she falls on the bed beside Alex. 

"Shit." Kara covers her eyes with her arm. "fuck, Alex, I'm sorry." 

All she hears is harsh breathing and sniffles, light shuffling as Alex struggles to come back to herself. The tick of the clock pings heavy in Kara's ears until her focus is drawn south when Alex's breathing finally evens out.

"Kara." Alex starts in a sigh. "Look at me?"

Kara lowers her arm hesitantly, meeting Alex's eye from the spot next to her. 

Alex gives her a wry smile, all soft around the edges and leans over on shaky limbs to press her mouth against Kara's. They exchange long, heated kisses before Alex inches back to nip at her bottom lip. "We're okay." Alex nudges her nose along Kara's as she reaches down to wrap her fingers around Kara's cock. Kara groans as Alex begins jerking her off slowly. "Thank you for stopping."

"I promised I would." Kara mumbles, eyes fluttering as pleasure races up her spine. "I want it to be special too."

Alex smiles and kisses her again.

**x**

Alex releases sweet little moans as Kara sucks gently on her clit. She arches her back as she winds her fingers in golden locks and grinds her pussy into her foster sisters pretty face. 

"Mm, Kara." 

Kara hums against her slick lips, tongue sliding deep inside her, leisurely flicking in and out. 

She would be embarrassed by the noises coming out of her mouth if she had the presence of mind to, but it's hard to focus on anything outside of the fog in her head and the sensation between her legs. 

Alex can admit that she's thought about this before. Vividly, and at length. On those nights after she would push Kara away and Kara, whether out of anger or hurt, would choose to leave the house entirely. Alex would lay in bed after, wet and aching, upset at herself for wanting things she shouldn't, but unable to stop herself from rubbing at her clit and humping against a pillow as she imagined Kara taking her from behind before going down on her. 

Whimpering, Alex bucks into Kara's mouth when her foster sister does something with her tongue that made her cum a little. She bites her knuckle as her eyes narrow into hazy slits. 

“That feels so good, Kara.” Alex murmurs, running a palm back through Kara's hair, urging her closer. "You're so good to me."

Kara moans like she's the one getting off and grips the tops of Alex's thighs, kneading into the skin there. Shuddering, Alex drapes her legs along the tops of broad shoulders and eagerly humps her foster sisters pretty, pretty face. "Oh, _ oh. _ Yeah, that's it. Just like that, Kara." She whines, lashes fluttering as a soft tongue licks up her spread pussy lips to suck at her pulsing clit. 

"F_uck._" Alex feels herself grow closer at each swipe of Kara's tongue, the pressure building as she tries to buck her hips up. Kara holds her down, not letting her move as she works her over with her tongue. 

The display of power mixed with the heady feeling of pleasure causes a familiar heat to spread through Alex's stomach and she comes with a gasp. Whining, Alex's fingers tighten in Kara's hair as her foster sister continues to suck on her clit. 

"Mm, Kara." Alex tugs weakly. "Come here. Kiss me."

Kara swipes her tongue on Alex's clit one more time before leaning back, breathing heavy. Alex's breath hitches as she sees the way Kara stares at her swollen cunt as an agile finger runs up her pussy lips.

"I love how you feel inside." Kara murmurs, meeting Alex's eyes from where she's settled between her legs. "You're so soft and tight." Kara presses a kiss to her lips before nuzzling her cheek. "I just want to keep you here forever."

Lashes fluttering, Alex goes to wrap her arms around the tops of Kara’s shoulders and raise up. Her eyes swirl. Heatsick. 

"I love you so much." Alex says, her throat hitching. "I don't think I'll ever love anyone as much as I love you."

Kara softens against her while simultaneously pushing her down further into the mattress. "I love you just as much, Alex."

They lay together silently for several long moments before Kara lifts off of Alex enough to look down at her, blue eyes dark with concern. "How are you feeling, by the way?” Alex’s nose wrinkles as Kara reaches over to brush her hair back. “Are you okay?" 

"I...yeah.” Alex begins in a whisper, trailing her fingers up and along the bare skin of Kara’s back. “It's weird. This heat feels different. It's like…” she pauses, considering her words carefully. “I still want to be knotted, but-but I want it to be _ your _knot. Only yours and if I can’t have that I- honestly, Kara, just being around you is enough."

A pleased smile lifts the corners of Kara's lips at that and Alex feels a flush of heat. "Good." The word rumbles in Kara's chest as she blankets the length of Alex's body. "You're mine now, Alex. No one else can have you.”

Alex inhales shakily, burying her face in the curve of Kara’s neck. 

_ That’s all I’ve ever wanted _ She thinks to say. 

She falls silent instead. 

.

.

.

.

.

"Hey, Alex."

"Mm?"

"What's going to happen when Monday comes?"

**x**


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Died on a Saturday,  
Buried on Sunday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tags go into full effect here. Trigger warnings applicable.

**xxx**

The swell of heat dissipates with the setting of the sun. Evening again. Alex feels self conscious as she walks down the narrowed pathway to the market in town. Kara’s scent is a constant that lingers on her skin, but it’s now awash with a mix of cum and possessive intent that not even a shower had been able to clear her of. She’s owned and marked and taken in all ways but one. Two? 

Alex isn’t sure how to feel about it.

There’s still that hint shame to it that leaves her sticky. A little sick. All her plans laid to ruin in a fit of heat. Alex had awoken with a need for space. A way to ease the conflict in her head. It had been hard to think when the air was laden with the same alpha pheromones that had urged her to submit. All released at the behest of her omega, who had no issue begging for it. 

She had left her foster sister tangled up in rumpled sheets, lost in the depths of a self satisfied sleep. Alex swallows, her head swirling with thoughts of the last few days. She and Kara had slipped into their respective roles with a glee that belied their promise to be better. Reveled in it even. 

Never before had her instincts overwhelmed her to this extent. 

There’s a faint indentation of sharp teeth along her neck; a flurry of bruises that lay sporadic on her skin. Kara had trouble controlling her strength when they started. Had been too excited to be mindful, too eager to please. An effect of the coming of rut maybe? Kara’s the last alpha of an extinct race stuck on a planet where her instincts are regulated by the sun. Alex gets the feeling that her foster sister is as lost as she is when it comes to this stuff. They’re out of their element. 

Alex releases a puff of air as she crosses her arms, burrowing deeper into the collar of Kara’s hoodie. God does she wish she had gotten more sleep. She had barely spared a glance at the mirror as she left the house, but had seen enough to know that her eyes are rimmed with an outline of red. She sighs. At least it’s quiet out. The fresh air cools her heated skin, helps clear the fog. The forest is alive despite the venture into darkness. The leaves rustle in a reminder of the coming of fall. 

She wonders what will happen when morning comes. They don’t have the excuse of their hormones to fall back on. Alex rubs at her face wearily. Does this make them mates now? Maybe as close to that as they can get after a weekend spent with affirmations of love and commitment. Her face flushes. It’s embarrassing to think about the things she had said, the way she opened up so easily. The Alex from before would hate her for this. For being so willing to submit. But it’s _ Kara. _ Kara with her spirals of blue and wistful tones. Kara who loves without pretense or reserve. Kara who is always so sweet, so considerate of Alex’s wants and needs even at the detriment of her own. It’s difficult to care for the perceived indignity of it when Alex is _ so _ in love with her.

Forever with Kara wouldn't be long enough. 

Alex takes in a long breath, releasing it slowly from her nose. Her heart hurts, aches like the length of her frame. She had left to find clarity, but only slips deeper into a pit of her own making. 

_ I’ve changed so much in only a few short months. _Alex muses with a small smile before a sharp sound draws her from her thoughts. The grating of a familiar chuckle. Her brows knit together as she slows her gait before stopping her in her tracks completely. A severe stench lies pervasive and Alex feels herself start to tense. 

Jensen.

She recoils at the realization. Distress wracks through her form as the back of her neck starts to sting. A deep longing for the comfort of Kara’s presence surges through her and Alex has to take a breath to anchor herself. 

Calm. Steady. _ Breathe. _

Alex falls off the main road, inching closer to a towering tree. She places a trembling palm against the rough bark and holds her breath. Did he notice her yet? Her brows furrow in consideration. Would he even be able to recognize her scent when it was so entwined with Kara’s? She waits for a few seconds, weighing her options. If she leaves now, he might see her, and if that happens the… then _ what? _ Alex feels herself start to scowl. Since when did she feel the need to hide like some poor, weak omega. God, to be reduced to this quivering, frightened thing. 

Pathetic. 

Shaking her head to rid her of her nerves, Alex leans forward to get a closer look. She frowns when she notices that Jensen isn't alone. 

_ What’s he doing with them? _

Kenny Li stands beside Jensen with his arms crossed, huddled in on himself. Looming next to him is Cameron, who blocks the path back. There's an apprehensive shift to Cam’s frame that Alex recognizes as shame. A shuffle to his feet. He reeks of fear and uncertainty.

She bites her lip. 

They’re too far off for her to hear a word spoken so she focuses her attention on the obvious threat. There’s something..._ off _ with Jensen's scent. Different. Wrong. Worse than before. Recognized enough to still cause her stomach to hurt. A lurch to her gut. She can’t get over it. 

_ Danger, danger, danger. _

Her instincts call out for her to _ leave. _She swallows, throat dry, pressing harder into the tree. Alex watches as Jensen moves forward to set his palms on both Cam and Kenny’s shoulders, forcing them to turn away as he chuckles once more. The noise travels with the wind. Her nails dig into the remnants of bark as they slip out of sight, further from the beaten path. She waits a moment and then exhales, growing slack along the tree.

Fuck. A packless omega alone with two unmarked alphas. 

The caste system is distasteful. She _ hates _it. Hates it enough to take part in it. 

_ Hypocrite. _

Alex bites her tongue only to release it at the taste of blood. Stupid. She doesn’t even know why she had stayed to this point. Maybe to prove she’s not afraid? Her mother’s words start to play in a mantra in her head. She’s sick again. 

It doesn’t matter. It’s none of her business really. She’s sure Kenny will be fine. She should just go home. Back to her room, back to _ Kara. _

Where she'll be safe.

Alex turns to follow.

**x**

Kara awakes with a start, her throat and eyes burning. She’s _ exhausted. _ It’s an old kind of new. The last time she had felt this drained was back on Krypton. Her lids start to droop. The faint thump in her head rings dissimilar to the pain she feels when her senses are overwhelmed. She’s tempted to slip back into the realm of the unconscious, but something gives her pause. Kara shifts in bed, drawing up into a slump. Shaky. She tugs rumpled covers forward to drape over her waist, her brows furrowing. As she moves, her length brushes aimlessly beneath the cloth, a reminder it’s there. She’s bare beneath the quilt, knot swelled. 

The house is silent. Quiet in all the wrong ways, loud in every other.

Kara breathes in sharply then, finally noticing the distinct absence of her foster sisters scent. Her stomach drops. 

Alex is gone.

She squeezes her eyes shut, hunching over to cradle her head. 

_ Fuck. _ What has she done? 

Had they gone too far last night? Had it been too much? _ You’re mine _ she had said. Why, _ why _ did she say that? Who was she to take ownership of Alex in such a way? 

_ An alpha _comes a whisper in her head. 

She grits her teeth, throat hitching. _ I'd never degrade you like that. _

_ Rao, _ what a joke

Kara can still taste Alex on her tongue.

She takes in shallow breaths, nearing the cusp of a full blown panic. Her powers fray. 

Her eyes sting with heat. Kara clasps a palm over them and inhales shakily. Long moments pass. Settle. _ Settled. _She drops her hand to the bed spread, her shoulders drooping. Alex has been gone long enough for her scent to grow indistinct. What does that mean exactly? The guilt makes her stomach ache. 

Kara draws the covers away with trembling hands and plants her feet on the floor next to the bed. 

She finds herself still hard despite the distressing thoughts. Annoyance flickers through her followed by a swell of dejection. Alex leaving has to mean something, right? Alex wouldn’t just abandon her after an entire weekend reaffirming her love.

Kara grits her teeth, her fingers curling inward. She could find Alex now, if she wanted to. It wouldn’t take much. She just wants to know that her foster sister is okay. And to apologize. Perhaps ask Alex to tell her what she did wrong. 

It’s that thought, however brief, that causes her to stop and reflect. Kara forces herself to calm, shoulders easing back. Alex loves her. She knows that. She _ knows _that. It’s her hormones that are causing her to overreact. 

Her mind feels hazy, but there’s something sharp that lines her thoughts. A flicker of a memory. Knowledge contained in forbidden books. She really should have taken the time to learn more about her rut.

Kara sighs, falling back into bed. Maybe Kal’s fortress has the information she wants? She closes her eyes and turns onto her side. It’s difficult to reign in the way her alpha calls out for their mate. 

_ I’m sure it’s fine. _ Kara thinks, curling in and around her foster sisters pillow. _ Alex will come back and then we’ll talk. It’ll be okay. _She takes a deep breath, resolved to wait for just a while longer. 

**x**

Alex shrugs off Kara’s hoodie with a swear and hastily presses the fabric against the gash on Kenny’s head. She leans over him in worry, searching for any other sign of injury as the panic from earlier steadily starts to build. 

“God, why’d you have to come out here, Danvers, huh?” Jensen asks, a tremulous quality to his tone. "Always sticking your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

Alex can hardly hear him with the way blood rushes to her head. She _ knew _something was wrong. Alex had stumbled into the clearing to find Jensen coaxing Kenny onto his knees, growling as he uttered promises of safety and pack protection if Kenny were to do this one thing. She curses her impulsivity. Alex hadn’t been able to stop herself from crying out in shock. She will never forget the way Kenny had looked when he turned his face upward. 

Defeat wasn’t a strong enough word. 

There was an escalation as Kenny tried to get to his feet, expression flushing with humiliation as he told Jensen he wanted to stop. The worst of it was Cam standing off to the side, his gaze cast down. Unwilling to help despite Kenny’s pleas. 

And then Jensen had lashed out. 

“You always ruin things for me, Alex.” Jensen starts to pace back and forth, growing more animated the longer he speaks. “You've taken everything from me. I’m the oldest. I was supposed to be the leader of the pack.” He glares down at her in contempt. “You convinced Vicki to turn against me. Over and over again_ . _ My own sister.” Disgust coats his words as he spits at her feet. “Choosing some omega whore over _ blood _.”

Alex flinches, hunching further over Kenny’s prone form. Her fingers quiver as she attempts to stay calm, but finds herself unable to. She’s finally figured out what’s wrong with his scent. A packbond broken of his own will. The connection they have is severed, rage causing him to leave the pack. There’s nothing holding him back anymore. Vicki can't protect her.

Alex’s jaw tightens as she turns her head, leveling a glare at Jensen. “Going for pack leader was Vicki’s decision, Jensen,” Alex begins slowly, doing everything in her power to not let her fear show. “You can’t blame me for that.” Her gaze shifts between him and Cam, who only seems to fold inward on himself. 

There’s a twist to her gut as unease wracks through her form. She’s too far away to call out for help and Cam...Cam still hasn’t said a word. She stares over at him with a frown. The three of them have known each other since they were kids, but does that even matter at this point? Jensen had shown that he had no problems hurting her. Other than her family and Vicki, would anyone even care if something were to happen to her?

She cycles through possible scenarios. The police might cover this up, might give the boys a pass. Two unmated omegas, stupid enough to find themseles alone with two alphas in their prime. What did they expect to happen? Jensen and Cam are homegrown Midvale boys. Kenny, the outsider. Alex, Midvale born herself, might be considered acceptable collateral damage. 

This is bad. 

She squeezes her eyes shut. If she had never left the house...but no. At least Kenny wasn't alone in this. 

He's still bleeding.

“Listen, Jensen, I-I know you hate me, and that’s fine, I can live with that-” 

"Oh, you can live with it, huh?" He interrupts with a sneer. "How nice of you." 

She bites her lip as she returns her eyes to Kenny, noting the way he pales beneath her touch. “Kenny’s really hurt. Let me take him to a hospital. We-I won’t tell anyone what happened.”

It’s a lie and they both know it. Jensen scowls at her in response. “No would believe you anyway, Danvers,” he mutters darkly, eyes narrowing. “After everything you’ve done, you think I’d just let you go?”

She swallows, her heart thudding in her chest. Maybe it was for the best that she hadn’t told Kara where she was going. Kara may layer her contempt with pleasant smiles and airy chuckles, but her disdain for humans is evident to anyone who spends any amount of time with her. 

What would the girl who had lost everything do in a situation like this? 

“Okay. I understand. You can have me, but, but let Kenny go.” Alex stares back up at Jensen with a pleading expression. “Please, just. Cam can take him.” She starts to stand on shaky legs. If one good thing could come from this, it would be worth it. “Just let Kenny go.”

There’s a slight, subtle darkening around Jensen’s eyes and then-

Alex stumbles back, falling to one knee. Numb. She raises a trembling finger to her mouth and draws them away to find them coated with specks of blood. It takes a second for her to register the pain and Alex squeezes her eyes shut, cupping her jaw protectively. Her cheek and mouth throb from the impact. 

Jensen stands above her heaving, a manic look in his eye, fist raised. “You don’t get to tell me what to do, _ omega _.” He says it like it's a curse.

It is, in a way. She wouldn't be in this position if she wasn't one. 

The punch seems to knock the sense into Cam because suddenly he’s beside Jensen, holding him back with his palm. He looks just as shaken as Alex feels.

“H-hold up, Jens. Danvers is right. I didn’t sign up for all this when you asked me to set you up with Kenny.” Cameron glances over at Alex nervously. “Let's just get out of here, yeah? No one will ever have to know.”

Jensen pushes Cameron away, shakes him off like it's nothing. His gaze stays locked with Alex's the entire time. “This haughty little bitch thinks she’s better than me, better than _ us _ . Acts like she’s above it all when she’s not.” He frowns, nose wrinkling. “You haven't noticed how she _ smells _? All that moral posturing only for her to turn out to be just another slut."

Humiliation pulses through her as panic clogs her throat, thick and heavy. The implication behind it is clear. He _ knows _. Knows that she and Kara...Can he tell it's Kara's scent? He would have said something if he had, right? 

The urge to flee once again jogs at her mind, her instincts screaming at her to _ go, _but still, she hesitates. She glances over to Kenny once more. His features grow ashen and pale as blood soaks through the fabric of her hoodie. He had hit his head on a rock on the way down. How deep did the gash run? She swallows and takes in another shaky breath. 

Alex shoots a mournful look at Cam. “Please, Cam.” Her voice wavers on his name. "Let us go." It’s a last ditch effort to convince him to come to his senses, to _ stop _this, and for a second she thinks maybe it’s enough. That for once, he’ll do the right thing, and actually step up. But that moment passes as quickly as the wind and he lowers his palm from Jensen’s chest before stepping back, his gaze shifting. Inaction in the highest form. 

This society is broken.

Is this her punishment for all of those years of coasting through the chaos, unwilling to lift a finger to help? Existing in the safe confines of her home and pack, silent in the face of injustice. Alex mentally berates herself. No, past indecisions aside, she doesn’t deserve to get hurt. No one does. But she's alone in this. She has to be the strong one.

Alex meets Jensen’s gaze unflinchingly. “I’m not going to make it easy for you.” She firmly states, shoulders tensing. She's not sure what he's planning, but she has an idea. How will she cope with a violence like this? Alex shakes her head, ire tempering her resolve. "I'm not going to make it easy for you."

Jensen blinks, tilting his head as he considers her quietly before a wide smile breaks out along his face. The manic gleam returns to his eyes. “Good. That’s good. It’s no fun when they don’t fight,” he mutters, almost to himself. Jensen glances over his shoulder, “Cammie, are you sure you don’t-” he cuts himself off when he notices that Cam is no longer standing where he once was. 

Alex frowns over at the empty spot, indignation tightening her frame. “God, you and Cameron really are made for each other.” Her fingers curl into fist as she narrows her gaze. “You’re both fucking cowards.” 

Jensen stretches out his shoulders with a huff. “Dude’s always been squeamish. It’s whatever.” He chuckles as he starts to reach out towards her. “Just as fun without an audie-” There's a stutter to Jensen's voice as he chokes midlaugh. He holds his arm up, gaping wordlessly at the mangled stump that was once the length of it.

Alex covers her mouth as she crawls backwards. An instinct. Blood spews out lazily from a mess of flesh and bone. Anguish and horror claw at Jensen’s face, but finds he can’t scream with his mouth weld shut. It’s as if something had seared his lips together until all that was left was deformed, blistering skin. He attempts to grasp at his arm but his fingers slip through the carnage, unable to get a proper hold with the amount of blood that pours out of him. 

Nausea goes through Alex, her gaze flickering when she notices the figure behind him. There Kara stands, eerily dignified amongst the wreckage of her own making. The dark red glow of her eyes belies the apathy that frames her face. Specks of blood dust her cheeks and in her hand lays the remnants of Jensen’s arm. 

Kara appears in front of her in a flash and a tiny whimper escapes Alex when she finds herself wrapped up in arms as strong as steel. Steel that trembles and bends and molds itself around her. 

“Alex, Alex,” Kara murmurs in her ear, hold tightening to the point of almost pain. “Alex,” Kara says her name like a mantra, as if repeating it will ground her back to this reality, back to Earth, back to this moment in time. Despite everything, Alex finds herself sinking in Kara’s hold. Even with the visceral display demonstrating how seemingly indiscriminately Kara wields her strength, Alex knows she's safest in Kara's arms. 

She slides her palms up along Kara’s back and clutches at the fabric of a blood stained shirt, taking in shallow breaths as the fear from earlier swells and washes over her. She shivers as Kara’s heat warms her freezing skin.

_ Was I cold this entire time? _

Alex noses along Kara’s collar with a sniffle, tears stinging her eyes once more. Adrenaline drains from her as her body relaxes and she falls into Kara in a slump. Her stomach roils with revulsion at the sight of Jensen from over Kara’s shoulder. The boy lies still on the ground, cradling the area around his lost arm. 

If the situation before was bad, this is infinitely worse. Kara using her powers in this way, how effortlessly she tore through bone and flesh. It’s horrifying. It _ should _horrify her, the knowledge that it was Kara who had left behind this carnage, but what scares her the most is the way gratitude sits heavy in her chest at the realization that Jensen will never be able to hurt her again. 

The thought makes her feel ill. What kind of person is she to be okay with something like this? She swallows back bile as she tugs at Kara’s shirt. “Kara,” she gently calls, trying to get her foster sisters attention. Kara only shudders and pulls her in closer. “Hey.” Alex’s throat is tight with emotion as she curls her fingers along the base of Kara’s neck, a calming effect for both of them. “It’s okay, I’m okay,” she whispers, the words catching with each hitch of her breath as the truth of it sets into her. “I’m here. I’m safe. You kept me safe, okay?” She cants up to hug Kara harder. “Let me see you. Please.”

Kara tenses for a second at the small plea before softening around her and allowing Alex to lean back. Alex lets out a muted sound of displeasure as she slips her thumb into the sleeve of her shirt and lifts her hand to wipe away Jensen’s blood from the side of Kara’s face. Or is the blood Cameron’s? Alex is suddenly not so sure that he simply up and left.

Alex keeps herself still when Kara reaches over to carefully cradle her cheeks, ever so mindful of the bruising and her split lip. Anger and concern war in Kara’s eyes, which have dimmed into a faint glow of red. They flick over to Kenny’s prone form before returning to her, solemn. “Did he do anything else to you?” Kara’s voice is calm despite everything in her posture suggesting otherwise. 

“No,” Alex states in a clipped tone, feeling dizzy. Her head lolls as she thinks about what could have happened, _ would _ have happened had Kara not shown up.

Kara stares down at her for a moment, gaze searching. Alex can sense the energy rolling off of Kara in waves. The fact that her foster sister is able to restrain herself enough to hold her like this makes something inside Alex bloom and warm. 

"Okay," she says as she slowly nods. "Okay." Kara brushes her fingers along Alex's cheek and leans down to set their foreheads together as she lets out a shaky breath.

Alex swallows, Kara's promise from earlier returning to the forefront. "What-what happened to Cameron, Kara?” She finally asks, gripping Kara’s wrists in a shaky hold. Her thumb brushes along the thumping pulse point. “Did you- is he dead?” she frowns over at Jensen’s prone form, but finds she can't keep her eyes on him for long. “Is Jensen?”

A shadow falls over Kara’s face at the questioning. “No.” She sighs, casting her gaze over to Jensen in disinterest. "Not yet."A small smile curls up the corners of her mouth. “Just unconscious. Passed out from the blood loss and shock. Probably.” She clicks her tongue and Alex startles as Kara disappears from sight only to return a second later with Cam slung over shoulder. "This one too.” Kara tugs him forward, holding him by the collar. His shirt rips and he falls, but she catches him right before his body hits the ground. 

Kara chuckles as she carefully positions Cam so that he’s slumped on the trunk of a nearby tree. “You know, Kenny assured me that this one cared for him," she starts, eyes narrowing. She pats Cam's face before curling her fingers along his chin to tilt his head up. "Guess that wasn't true."

Alex's breath catches when she sees Kara's fingers tighten a fraction. _ She's going to break his jaw, _she thinks, a swell of nausea and exhaustion pulsing through her. She almost keels over as another shiver wracks her form, but Kara draws her up before she can fall. 

“It's okay,” Alex says before Kara can ask, though she finds herself leaning into Kara's sturdy frame anyway. “I'm okay." She promises as she buries her face in Kara's chest. 

Kara arms slip around Alex’s waist to pull her closer. "You're okay." She agrees as she lowers her face to Alex’s neck.

They stay wrapped up around each other for a few seconds before Kara speaks again. "I was so scared when I woke up and you were gone." Kara admits in a stilted voice. Pained. “I was afraid that I had pushed you away."

“Kara…” Alex starts to pull back at that, wanting, _ needing _to establish eye contact, but finds her movements restricted. Kara bends a little so that she can hoist Alex up by her thighs and have Alex wrap her legs around her.

“I was so scared,” Kara repeats in a murmur as she starts to walk them forward until Alex finds herself pinned against a tree. Soft lips graze along the side of her neck as Kara presses small kisses into her skin. “I could tell something was wrong. I could feel it.” Gentle fingers brush along the faint bite marks. “I wouldn't be able to handle it if I lost you too, Alex."

Oh that hurts to hear. Hurts more than the throb to her face. Alex wraps her arms around the tops of Kara’s back then, clinging to broad shoulders in desperation. “I’m sorry. I shouldn't have left without saying anything.” She kisses Kara's ear in apology. “I just wanted to grab some stuff from the store, but I saw Kenny with Jensen and Cam, and I just...” She trails off as she glances over at Jensen and Cameron hesitantly. “I couldn’t leave Kenny alone and-” Alex brushes her tongue along her bottom lip absently, only to wince at the slight sting of her cut, the burn of the bite on her tongue, and the taste of her own blood. “Jensen, he wouldn’t stop, Kara-” Fresh tears well up and she blinks aimlessly. "He wouldn't stop."

Fuck, she had been so stupid. _ So _stupid. Careless, needlessly reckless. And now Kara had gone and used her powers in a way that couldn’t possibly be explained away. 

If they didn’t get Jensen to a hospital, he was going to bleed out. If he hadn't already. And what about Cameron? He’s a witness, someone that can place Alex at the scene. If Jensen turns up dead, will Cameron go to the police? Will he point the finger at Alex? Scrutiny on her means scrutiny on all of her family, including Kara. If the police start poking around, will they start to take account of all of the strange occurrences that have happened since Kara had popped up in town? There were too many risks involved with letting them go. Alex wants to cry.

“Alex.” 

The call of her name snaps Alex out of the downward spiral. She stares down at Kara mournfully. The subtle acknowledgement and resignation in Kara’s eyes is enough to tell her that Kara has reached the same conclusion as her. 

Holding in a choked sob, Alex clings to Kara as the realization makes her heart stutter. Kara hums at the sound of it. “Don’t worry, Alex,” Kara husks, leaning forward to pepper kisses up and along Alex’s jaw. “I’ll take care of it. I’ll take care of everything,” she promises in a muted tone, as if what she’s done, what she’s going to do, has no affect on her at all.

Alex can only squeeze her eyes shut in response.

**x**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for how long it took me to get this chapter out 😣 thank you for waiting, reading, and commenting ♥️


	9. Chapter 9

**xxx**

Kara is mindful in the way she lowers Alex back to the ground. Palms steadying, movements unhurried. A deliberate slowing of paces. Alex’s eyes flutter shut when Kara’s knuckles brush along her cheek and down her jaw, settling on the base of her neck where her pulse beats frenetically. An anchoring point. 

There’s a shortness to her breath, a tightening in her throat; it’s difficult to breathe when the world is closing in around her, but Kara is stable and fixed. Solid in presence. The only thing keeping her from freaking out completely. How her foster sister can stay calm in this situation is beyond her scope of understanding. She feels like she’s hovering outside of her body, stuck in a state of unreality, and any moment now, she’ll come crashing back down to Earth. 

Something vile lurches in her stomach when Kara releases her entirely, stepping away so Alex no longer can feel her warmth. The cold seeps into her quickly from then on and Alex rubs at her arms as shivers start to race along her flesh. Her brows knit together as she looks up to find Kara appraising her silently. There’s a remote gleam to red eyes as they sweep over her form, searching. Alex goes to speak, but finds the words stuck in her throat. Lodged. Choking her. 

_ Kara killed someone for me._ She’s dizzy at the thought. _ This is all my fault. _

“Alex.” Her name is said in a whisper as Kara’s fingers pass over the bottom of her shirt. “I know you’re scared,” Kara starts, her voice low. She holds Alex’s gaze as warmth eclipses the haze of red. “I’m going to take care of you.”

_ You. _Not it. A subtle change that makes all the difference. The tension in Alex’s frame starts to unfurl as Kara occupies her space once more. “I need you to do exactly as I say.” Kara smiles a little, the expression fleeting. “I know it may be difficult, but I need you to trust me.”

“I do.” It slips out without thought. Reflexive. Alex mouth parts as she’s struck with a point of clarity. Despite all that has occurred, all that Kara has done, all that Kara _ will _ do, Alex trusts her beyond measure. It’s an intense, dizzying sort of realization. The thoughts and emotions don’t line up. Alex dimly wonders if she’s having a panic attack as another swell of nause pulses through her. 

She squeezes her eyes shut before taking a shallow breath. Alex catches Kara’s hand and tightens her fingers around it. This is the same hand that tore through flesh and bone and left bits of tissue flaked on the ground. This is the same hand that spent countless hours holding her gently, like she’s made of glass. Keeping her safe. All Kara’s tried to do is keep her safe, like Alex had failed to do for her. 

Alex swallows. "Just tell me what I have to do.”

Almost as if she can read her thoughts, a flicker of doubt crosses Kara’s face. Transitory. It tempers into a stilled composure. Kara inhales a beat before nodding, slow and sure. “Take off your shirt.” 

There was a time where Alex would have thought to hesitate, insecurity and doubt at the forefront of her mind, but there is no space for her to waver when the tics of the clock pound a tempo in her head. She steps back so she can pull her shirt over her head and present it out in front of her, looking up at Kara expectantly. 

Kara frowns, holding her gaze for a moment before she reaches out to take it. She’s gone before her fingers fully curl around the fabric, disappearing in a blink. Back before Alex’s third breath with the garment gone, and a sweater to replace it. 

“Here.” Kara strides forward, gingerly setting the sweater in Alex’s outstretched palm before moving out of reach. “Put this on.”

Alex follows her direction without much fanfare, tugging at the ends of the sweater as it envelops her frame. Her brows furrow when she notes the subtle traces of dirt and mud along the length of it. She glances over to Kara to find her foster sister floating midair, eyes enveloped by the empty. 

“Now listen to me carefully. This is what you’re going to do.”

**x**

It’s not a lie, per se. The details are a little smudged, the timeline a bit skewed, but it’s a retelling of occurrences that will prove factual. 

Kara says:

_ “Cam tried to get Jensen to stop.” _

_ “You ran out of the woods to call for help.” _

_ “You didn’t see what happened after.” _

Kara asks her to repeat. 

It’s true, it’s _ true. _ Cam _ did _ stop Jensen, if only for a moment. Alex _ did _ run away, but only after Kara told her to. Alex _ didn’t _ see Kara kill Jensen, her foster sister’s movements are imperceptible to human eyes. She didn’t see anything. She doesn’t know what happened. 

All of it will prove to be true.

**x**

Alex sits stock still in the waiting room of the police precinct, her stomach a mess of nerves. She fiddles with the ends of her sweater anxiously, eyes darting across the room in a way she’s sure only highlights her guilt. Alex hunches forward at the few pitying looks thrown her way. She can only imagine what they’re thinking. An omega covered in blood, dirt, and bruises. There’s few conclusions one can draw. 

She tries to keep mind occupied with equations as she waits for her parents to arrive. Returning early from their week long trip. 

Another thing she’s ruined.

Omega minors are not allowed to speak to officers unattended. The same law is applicable to alpha and beta minors, but only until they hit 16. A two year difference in treatment. This is one double standard that Alex finds herself grateful for. Corruption runs rampant in law enforcement. Alphas make up a staggering 86% of the police force. 

A rich get richer power dynamic.

Alex startles when she hears her name called across the room and looks up in time to find her mother rushing towards her. Her breath catches, stomach lurching. She readies herself, prepared to hear the same words that had poisoned her thoughts thrown back at her. A barrage of ‘I told you so’’s and ‘How could you be so stupid’s. Alex squeezes her hands together to brace against the onslaught. 

She finds herself swept up into a hug instead. Eliza’s arms are warm around her and Alex blinks, brows furrowed in confusion as her mother clings to her like she’s afraid she will disappear. Alex thinks to return the embrace, but finds her movements restricted by the sudden pressure on her side. 

“Oh, Alex.”

Distress mixes with the relief as her parents familiar pheromones suffuse the air. Dread sits heavy in her chest as she croaks out an, “I’m okay, mom.” Tears well up in her eyes as she says it because she’s _ not._

Eliza pulls back then, heartbreak written all over her face. Her cheeks are wet with sorrow. Eliza cups the sides of Alex’s face gently as she looks her over, gazing down at her like she loves her, has always loved her, will always love her. 

“My sweet girl. My baby,” Eliza murmurs before drawing Alex back into a tight hug. There’s a quiver to her frame as sobs wrack through her form and Alex feels regret like fingers digging into the back of her neck. 

“We were so worried,” Jeremiah’s voice trembles as he brushes a palm through Alex’s hair. “When we got the call that you had been involved in an assault…” he trails off then, sniffles hitching his throat. 

“I’m fine,” Alex mumbles, tongue thick with the lie. She passes a shaky palm along her mother’s back, a middling attempt to soothe. “It’s... it’s a long story.” And her face throbs, her limbs ache. Exhaustion racing along the sinews. She sinks into her mother’s arms as a shudder goes through her. 

“One that I’m hoping you can fill us in on.” A different voice chimes in and Alex glances over her mother’s shoulder to see a man standing behind them, his fingers curled around the length of his belt. Alex tenses at the glint of gold. A detective badge rests below his hand. 

It’s time. It’s time. What if they discover the lie buried beneath? Kara. They’ll take Kara from her. Kara will be alone again. Taken from another family because Alex couldn’t keep her story straight. 

_ Oh God, Oh god. _Alex’s teeth clatter as she hides her face in her mother’s chest, sick with herself. Eliza’s arm tightens around Alex’s shoulders in response.“This really can’t wait?” There’s a bite to the question, more than just parental apprehension. An alpha call to submit. One alpha to another. 

The detective doesn’t react. He keeps his body language open and steady as he responds to her mother’s challenge with ease. “The sooner we finish, the sooner Alex can go home and rest.” 

The sooner they finish, the sooner Alex can see Kara again. 

“It’s okay, mom.” Alex straightens a tad, squeezing Eliza’s side in a show of reassurance. If only for her parents sake. Her smile is no more than an upturn of lips as she meets her mother’s gaze. “I-I want to help.”

Eliza stares down at her for a long moment, her gaze searching. Alex holds her breath as she waits, her stomach twisting in nerves. Her heart races in a pitter-patter. 

Eventually Eliza sighs and gives a nod, albeit a reluctant one.“Okay, sweetheart.” Eliza leans over to press a kiss to Alex’s temple. “Your father and I will be listening. We’ll be just outside. You’ll tell us if it gets to be too much?”

A hint of a genuine smile passes over Alex’s mouth as she softens under her mother’s regard. The warmth momentarily dampens the ache. “I’ll let you know,” she promises in a whisper.

**x**

The story goes a little like this. 

Cameron held Jensen back, giving Alex enough time to escape. She stumbled out of the woods, frightened and hurt, and came across a couple walking back from the store. She asked if she could use one of their phones to call for help, as hers was lost in the scuffle. 

Unfortunately by the time the police had arrived to the clearing, Jensen was long gone. They had found an unconscious Cameron next to a semi-conscious Kenny. Turns out Jensen knocked Cam over the head with a blunt object of some sort. CSI speculates a bat. Jensen must have turned tail when Alex escaped. Or maybe when he heard the sirens blare. The precinct is located directly across from the market. A 10 minute walk, a 3 minute drive. 

Kenny was rushed to ICU, Cameron to the ER. Blood found at the crime scene matched DNA taken from Kenny Li, Cameron Coast, and Alex Danvers. Jensen Donahue is currently missing and wanted for processing. 

The front door to his place was left wide open when the police came to question him. His clothes were strewn around his room. He must have stopped at home to grab his wallet and pack a bag. 

This all happened in a matter of hours. Of course, she had experienced a severe physical and psychological trauma. Her memories weren’t perfect, but they’re _ good enough. _

The story will end up being a write off, a notation for the official report.

Further details pending. 

**x**

There’s something calming about the vast oasis of ice and silence. A door materializes behind her, ice splintering and reforming until the entrance to the place she spent her first months on Earth is once again closed. The Fortress of Solitude, Kal calls it. The name is crass and humorless, reeks of human impetus. Kara doesn’t hate it, per se, but like all things on this planet, takes to it with a faint weariness that only seems to stagnate as time goes on. 

She doesn’t think about what she’s done. She can’t. 

There’s something buried beneath the surface that she’s not ready to touch on. 

Kara walks over to the center console with purpose, sweeping her fingers along the buttons as a sting of melancholy goes through her. The technology is old by Kryptonian standards, which is possibly the only reason Jor-El had been able to form this construct without drawing attention. She presses her thumb along the center pad and waits for her name to register on screen. 

_ User: Kara Zor-El _

_ Affiliation: House of El _

_ Title: Scion _

A buzzing noise sounds around the Fortress as Kelex switches from standby mode and floats its way over to her.

_ “_How may I help you today, Lady Zor-El?”

She frowns slightly, still wary of the fact that Jor-El would include a title that had been stripped from her in the system he designed for seemingly Kal’s eyes only. It had been quite a shock the first time she had seen her name highlighted on the screen. The unknown reasoning behind the acknowledgement still manages to unnerve her to this day. 

“Hello, Kelex.” She starts quietly, turning to look over at the service bot with a small smile. “I need information on how Earth’s star affects Kryptonian physiology.”

Kelex tilts its head. “Specification?”

Kara bites her lip as she attempts to recall what presenting was called before the Codex came into effect. Her mother’s books flash before her eyes. “Rao’s...Anointment?”

Kelex’s eyes glow red. “Processing request.”

Kara blinks, surprised she had guessed right. She returns her gaze to the console monitor as it flashes before familiar notes of Kryptonese fill the screen. Her brows furrow as she quickly reads through the texts. 

The unease that had been steadily building for months now curls in her stomach, sticky and slick. 

When it comes to her coming of age, it seems there are quite a few things she had missed.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

Three days go by before Alex sees Kara again. 

**x**

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Just wanted to say thank you so much for all of the comments last chapter. Really means a lot that so many of you are enjoying the story. Every time I get that notification that someone has left a comment, I get giddy with anticipation because I love seeing what you all think. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and see you for the next one!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much for the kind comments. Appreciate you guys! sooo, fandom drama. Gotta love it, amirite? Best to hang out here in fanfic land instead.
> 
> LOVE YOU GUYS

** xxx **

The first night is the hardest. 

Alex spends the majority of it staring vacantly up at her ceiling. The cracks spread along the plaster, folding into one another before splintering off. The air too still, too quiet, but the pain is a constant that refuses to abate. Her cheek and mouth throb along the pulse of her heart. She aches in a way that feels significant. Broken into little pieces of her own making. 

When her eyes finally drift shut, she’s plagued by night terrors that blend with one another before panic seizes her throat and jolts her awake. She stumbles her way to the bathroom then, tripping over discarded shoes, barely makes it before she’s sick. 

As she sniffs and cries along the wall of her bathroom, Alex is left with one stark image playing beneath her eyelids. 

Her in Kara’s place, tearing Jensen apart. 

**x**

Monday comes.

Everyone knows what happened. 

Dark gazes follow her as she makes her way through the hallways and into class. The hours blend into a haze. She makes it to 3rd period before she calls her father to take her home. Eliza is worried, tells her that she doesn’t have to go back if she’s not ready, but Alex is nothing if not stubborn. She’d rather be in class than at home where she'll sit alone in the dark, surrounded by Kara’s scent, but lacking her presence. 

The second day isn’t much better. There are whispers of disdain and pity that circle around her steps. Her packmates steer clear of her, lest they draw the ire of the Elders before this mess is cleaned up. She feels antsy as she sits at her desk, uncomfortable with the stares directed her way. 

At lunch, she slips out the side entrance that leads to the football field. Alex ducks her head as she hurries to her car, palms shaking. She spends 40 minutes collecting herself before she drives to the hospital to check in with Kenny. Even though he's conscious, his parents won’t let her see him.

Mr. Li is polite in his dismissal, but scorn sits as clear as day in Mrs. Li’s visage. Alex can hazard a guess at what she's thinking. The story she told the police doesn't paint her in the best light. At the end of the day, she's made to sound like a coward who cared more for her own personal safety than that of her friend.

Alex eyes sting, but there's nothing she can do to clear her name without outing Kara’s so she grits her teeth and turns to exit the way she came. 

Outside, Alex sits hunched over on a bench, her head a steady throb as sobs wrack through her. She gets home by 6 and lays in the bath until the water grows cold. Once dry, she crawls into Kara’s bed and slips under the covers, curling around them. A cocoon of fading pheromones. She shivers as anguish stifles her, crushing her chest.

On Wednesday, it takes hours before she gets sick again. Luckily she makes it to the third stall without embarrassing herself in front of everyone. What surprises her most is that it’s Stephanie who holds her hair out of her face and rubs her back as she loses what little breakfast she had.

Stephanie murmurs soft reassurances as she helps Alex sit, a pillar to her side. A gentle comradery. _ It could’ve happened to any of us. _Her eyes seem to say. There’s no vitriol when Stephanie speaks her name. 

The seconds tick by as Alex heaves against the wall. She coughs a little into her shirt as she waits for her stomach to settle. 

“Thanks, Steph.” Her voice trembles along the words, an ache to her throat. Alex rubs her eyes as she inhales a shaky breath, suddenly feeling uncomfortable at the fact that she threw up in front of her best friends girlfriend. The same girlfriend who has had an issue with her for years now. 

Alex grimaces as she attempts to push that thought to the recesses of her mind.“Um, I-” She hesitantly turns to look over at Stephanie. “I haven’t gotten the chance to talk to Vicki yet. Is she...” Alex trails off, unsure how to continue without a slight to their tenuous trust. 

Stephanie smiles then, the smallest upturn of her lips before she knocks her shoulder against Alex’s. 

“Vicki’s with her mom. They have to talk to the Elders of the Donahue clan about the implications of Jensen’s actions.” Stephanie explains, her tone solemn. “She hasn’t told me much, but it doesn’t look good, Alex.” She frowns. “You know what happens to an alpha who can’t control their pack.”

Flinching, Alex curls in on herself as her head dips in a jerky nod. “Right.” 

It’s disastrous, for one. A sign of weakness. Eligible for a loss of privileges. Or worse. Guilt courses through Alex at the thought of Vicki losing her Pack Master status because of her. 

“I think more than anything she feels guilty that she wasn't there to protect you.” Stephanie draws her knees up to her chest to wrap an arm around them. “Vicki loves you, Alex,” she mumbles. "I knew that before we got together. And even though she's told me countless times that it's not romantic, I was still jealous of you.” Stephanie lifts her eyes to meet Alex’s, tears eclipsing the hollow of her gaze. “Vicki was with me that day. She felt the moment Jensen broke his pack bond.” Stephanie swallows, throat bobbing. “She was so worried about you, but I asked her to stay and I-”

“What happened to me isn’t your fault,” Alex cuts in, shaking her head. "I wasn't even with Jensen when his bond broke and even if she _ had _ realized he was with me, there’s no way she would have known where to look.” She reaches over to squeeze Stephanie’s shoulder in a firm hold. “Vicki would never blame you for this, Steph.” 

In all honesty, Alex is relieved Vicki had chosen to stay with Stephanie, unnerved at the very idea of her best friend having been there that night. She sees Jensen again in her minds eye, curled up on the ground, grasping his mangled limb, screams stifled in his throat. 

Alex’s gut lurches and she blinks against the tears that strain her vision. “It’s not your fault,” she mumbles before turning away. Nausea curls her stomach as she mirrors Stephanie’s movements, lowering her head to the junction of her knees. 

_ It’s mine. _

**x**

Kara twines her fingers along her mother’s pendant, her voice a whisper as she recites an adage of her past: 

_ Passion must give way to restraint. _

_ Passion must give way to restraint. _

_ Passion must give way to restraint. _

A man is dead because of her. 

She’s processing. 

There’s a box of trinkets which once held the necklace that now lays against her heart. It’s tucked beneath the console of her discarded ship. She keeps it there so it won’t be lost. The few remnants of Krypton that are all her own, things that Kal’s influence couldn’t touch.

She doesn’t know how long she’s been at the Fortress. There’s a concept of time that lies in contrast to reality. Vestiges of the Phantom Zone. A prison of banality. 10 years, 15, 24, 50. What is time when your body holds still? 

Kara thinks how nice it would have been to stay there. At least in the abyss of space Alex would be safe. She’s changed. Her mind is clear of haze and rut, primal instincts in retreat. This is the most in control she’s felt in months. 

The Codex’s existence takes on new meaning. Kara has to wonder if she would have ever learned the truth behind her status if Krypton had survived and she had remained Kara Zor-El. The legitimacy of Jor-El’s data lies in question. She has no reason to believe her uncle’s claims, but what would he have to gain by lying? 

The Council's attempts at neutering Rao’s Anointment makes sense. From the birthing matrix, to the procedure of Zil. To fall slaves to baser instincts just because nature dictates it would have been...unbecoming. Their society would have never come to be.

Kara releases a shaky exhale, her eyes closing. 

So what good are tales from the dead? 

She sits up from her meditative stance, wiping at wet stain of her knees. She’s been sitting here for Rao knows how long. Kara gives one more cursory glance around the Fortress before sighing. 

It’s finally time to go home.

**x**

Though Kara is surprised to find Alex stationed on the roof, the sight of her foster sister is always a welcome one. She smiles in spite of her misgivings, happiness surging through her only for the relief to be followed by an onslaught of guilt as she thinks of how she’s been away for days. 

She had called Eliza on her way out of town and left a voicemail stating she was visiting the Fortress in order to prep for her rut. Best for them to think she spent her coming of age in solitude than on top of their daughter. 

Kara releases a deep breath through her nose as she floats up the stairs of the house. She hears Jeremiah and Eliza in their bedroom, discussing the harsh realities of what Alex had to deal with while she was gone and feels shame tight in her chest. She grits her teeth. 

While eager to get to Alex so she can start to explain, she fights against the urge that longs to take hold and steadies herself. 

_Shower first, then talk. _

She uses her super speed, unwilling to wait any longer than she already had to. Kara runs a towel through her hair as she pads barefoot into the room, tossing it over the side of a chair only to falter when she looks over at her bed. 

Kara’s brows furrow, noting with a vague unease how Alex’s scent stains the covers. If anything, that makes her feel worse._ I should've been here for my mate_\- Kara’s teeth descend in a growl as she shakes her head. Alex isn’t her mate. She has to stop thinking of her like that if they’re going to get through this. 

Running a weary palm along her face, Kara takes a breath before walking over to the window. She sticks her head out after she draws it up to find Alex sat in the same spot from earlier. 

Alex keeps silent even as Kara hauls herself up, one foot at a time. Human level. Mindful of ever watchful eyes. She wipes her palms on the back of her jeans before taking a seat beside Alex. Not too close, but enough to scent her clearly. 

Kara’s eyes drift shut, fingers twitching against the length of her thigh as she takes in Alex’s presence. 

They sit together for several minutes before Alex finally speaks. “You’re home,” she says, voice chilling Kara’s spine. The sound of it is dull, vacant of familiar warmth. 

Kara laces her fingers together anxiously, gaze pensive. There are dark circles that spiral under pretty brown eyes. A gaunt draw to Alex’s frame as she holds her legs close to her chest. Almost as if to shield herself, even from Kara. Kara heart stutters at the sight. She’s reminded of her early days on Earth then, when she’d frequent the roof more often than not, posture bent much the same way. 

“I’m home,” Kara answers quietly. Discomfort pricks her skin as a steady thread of shame spirals in her chest. “I’m sorry I haven't been here for you, Alex,” she whispers. It’s not enough to make up for what she’s done, but she says it anyway. 

Alex’s head inclines to the side as she turns her stare to Kara, unhappiness pinching her features. “Why didn’t you come home that night?” 

Kara swallows. “Because I was afraid.” She deliberates on what she wants to say. “You know, murder was considered the greatest crime on Krypton. All life is precious under Rao.” Kara’s brows knit together as she slowly recounts teachings from long ago. “All life except for the Guildless, that is.”

There’s a softening of Alex’s expression as she listens, the anger fading into something contemplative, like it always does when Kara speaks about her past. 

“The Great Houses only cared as far as the southern border. Walls aligned the inner city, impenetrable to those who didn’t have a House name. We were left to our own devices.” 

She remembers a boy named Drok. He was one of the few people to show her kindness when she was first stripped of her status. Drok had tried to steal from a transport of food, only to be caught and made an example of. There was no retaliation to be had unless they wished to incite the wrath of the Military Guild on the entire block. He wasn’t the first, and he wouldn’t be the last, and that had made her so_ angry. _But she had locked those feelings up. Now she's stewing in a mess of emotions, fallen off the side of a cliff.

Kara fingers curl inward as she stares into the dark. “I’ve done a lot of bad things in my life, Alex, but I’ve never killed anyone before.”

There’s a sharp intake of breath beside her. Kara’s eyes fall shut. She killed someone. Rashly. Violently, she tore him apart. Unthinking. And then she covered it up. 

How does one come back from this sort of trauma? 

All that’s left in the wake of Krypton’s destruction is a bitter pull at her chest that will last until the end of her days. 

“Kara…” 

There’s a gentle cadence that surrounds the call of her name. She bites her lip, feeling hollow as she stares down at her hands. Her palms are flaked in clay, streaked in blood. Residual remain pushing towards decay. Alien.

“I was so afraid of losing you that I lost control.” Kara’s hands fall to her side as her gaze aligns with the empty space that once held Rao’s light. “How could you ever want me again after what I’ve done.”

It’s more a statement than anything. Kara doesn’t expect an answer, so she continues before Alex can give her one.

“I had been feeling...disjointed lately. Out of it.” She runs her palm along the length of her face. “I thought maybe it was linked to my rut, so I went to the Fortress to look through the archives for answers.” 

Alex worries her bottom lip as she scoots just a little closer. “What did you find?” she asks softly. 

Kara hesitates, uneasy at the thought of relaying this information, but she pushes through because Alex _ deserves _ to know the truth. 

“Beta’s were in the majority by design on Krypton. Alpha and omega children were rare because those genes had been filtered out to the point of nonexistence.” She pauses. “That’s actually why omega’s were held in such high regard. Though unnecessary, the ability to bear children was considered beautiful,” Kara discloses with a faint smile. “A gift from Rao.”

Kara falters when she feels the warmth of Alex’s palm slip into her own and she raises her head to find Alex’s features pinched in concentration, expression far off and wistful. Kara sighs. She understands the implications of her words, can only imagine how jarring the idea would be for someone who grew up in a society that valued the opposite. 

She lifts their joined hands to press a kiss to the back of Alex’s. A silent acknowledgement, but one all the same. She clears her throat and continues where she left off. “I was supposed to go through a procedure to help mitigate the more unsavory aspects of my coming of age.” Kara’s nose wrinkles. “But we lost Guild status before I could.”

“Sounds classist.” Alex comments dryly, her expression mirroring Kara’s in that moment. 

Kara grins at her foster sisters sardonic tone, amused by the annoyance she can hear dripping from each word. “Oh, it definitely was,” she states with a wry smile. “Few that they were, the Guildless alpha’s were forced to suffer through unregulated ruts.” Kara tilts her head in consideration. “Which was fine from what I saw. Painful, but manageable.” 

“I’m starting to get the feeling that it’s a bit different here.” Alex quietly points out. 

Emotion tightens Kara’s throat as she swallows, her eyes lowering to the ground. “Yeah,” she whispers. “On Krypton, mating bonds were clinical. Detached. It was safer that way.” Kara starts to play with Alex’s fingers as she talks. “What was a matter of tradition is transformed into a need under Sol. If I bite someone with the intent to mate during rut, it’s permanent. A soul tie.”

Alex regards her thoughtfully for a long moment before releasing a small sigh. “Being tied with you forever doesn’t sound like a bad thing, Kara,” she utters sullenly, her gaze drifting outward. Her fingers loosen around Kara’s as she makes to let go of her hand. “At least not for me.”

Kara panics when she feels Alex’s hand go slack around hers. “That’s not what I meant, Alex,” she quickly replies as she moves to kneel in front of her foster sister. Kara takes both of Alex's hands in hers as she ducks her head to catch her eyes. “That’s not what I meant,” Kara repeats to her softly, expression earnest. 

When Alex tentatively meets her gaze, Kara feels her chest constricts at the hurt she can see reflected in Alex's eyes. “Jor-El included a probability ratio for interspecies propagation," she hesitantly relays. 

Dark brows furrow in confusion.“What does that even-”

“Human/Kryptonian pregnancies have a 89% fatality rate for the childbearer.” She lets the words hang in the air as she watches Alex's face for a reaction. 

Alex's mouth parts as she gapes at Kara. “I mean, that’s-" She blinks a few times. "That's...a lot.” She carefully settles on. “Are you sure?” she asks in a whisper.

“I had Kelex run the numbers three times. I’m sure.”

After a moment, Kara drops Alex’s hands to lean back on her haunches. “So that’s why it would be better if you found someone else." She rubs a palm along the back of her neck uncomfortably. "You’ll probably want kids in the future, and I can’t give them to you, so…” Kara grimaces as she trails off, eyes shifting away.

Alex slowly nods as she processes, her expression gradually shifting to one of understanding. “Is that why you stayed away for so long?” she gently prods.

Kara shrinks into herself at the question. “I-yeah,” she mumbles, her fingers curling inward as she lowers her palms back to her legs. “I just needed some time to try and be okay with letting you go,” she shakily admits, voice cracking a little at the end. 

It’s an embarrassing sound. Shameful. Weak. Like she’s some pathetic whelpling. Kara's throat hitches as anger sears through her chest. She squeezes her eyes shut as she tries to reign in her emotions.

Warm hands settle on the sides of Kara’s face as Alex breathes out her name. The touch is light, delicate. As if Kara will shatter into pieces if she were to press too hard.

“Look at me, Kara.” 

And Kara does, no matter how reluctantly. No matter how much it hurts.

Alex eyes are soft when Kara finally meets her gaze. “I’m never going to want anyone more than I want you.”

Kara rears back at that. “You don’t _know_ that," she fitfully protests, a jolt of irritation going through her. “You're going off to college next year. What if you meet someone, huh?” She's scowling even before the words finish leaving her mouth, enraged at the idea of Alex with anyone else.

_ Guess those days away didn’t account for much_. Comes the bitter thought. 

“We can’t just pretend like things are always going to be the same, Alex,” she says, huffing as her shoulders tense. She's on a roll now. “We’re not going to be kids forever and you don't-”

"That’s enough, Kara,” Alex says, mouth thinning out into a muted line

Kara's jaw clamps shut at the command and she grits her teeth. Doesn’t Alex get that she’s just trying to keep her safe? Why does her foster sister always have to be so damn stubborn about everything?

A low growl vibrates in her chest, but Alex only raises a brow in response, seemingly unaffected by her antics. The noise cuts off instinctively and she eyes Alex warily then, poised for escape, but something in Alex’s gaze gives her pause. 

There’s a determination in her expression that Kara’s never seen before. She purses her lips as she observes her foster sister for several seconds before grimacing. 

Kara clicks her tongue and looks away, her chin dipping. The highest forms of respect an alpha can show is a willingness to listen and obey. She bows her head in acquiescence.

The corners of Alex’s mouth twitch, presumably at the show of deference, before she rocks up on her knees to palm the back of Kara’s neck. The touch is soothing and does wonders to calm her frayed nerves.

“My star girl, always so concerned," Alex says fondly, tilting her head as she gives Kara a sweet smile. "You spend so much time worrying about me you often forget to worry about yourself."

Kara's nose wrinkles a tad. "Are you sure we're not talking about you?" she huffs even as her irritation begins to melt under the warmth of Alex's touch. 

"Mm, maybe." Alex hums before releasing a small sigh. "Listen, Kara, I don’t know what the future holds, or what’s going to happen to us when we’re older." She bites her lip as she starts to play with the hair at the nape of Kara's neck. “The only thing I know for sure is that I’m in love with you." She shyly admits, a hint of red dusting her cheeks. "I don’t want to give you up.”

Kara’s heart flutters as guilt and relief war within her. She sniffs, blinking back against the stinging in her eyes, still feeling off balance even in the midst of Alex’s reassurance. “Don't you want to have a family, Alex?" 

"_You'r__e _ my family." Alex firmly counters, a note of finality in her tone. She scratches her fingers along Kara’s neck and down, thumbing the racing pulse point."I won't let you push me away,” she whispers as her brows knit together. "We'll figure it out, Kara.”

Tears start to track down Kara’s face as Alex folds into her, her foster sisters arms wrapping around her neck in a hug. 

"Let’s just go inside for now, okay?” Alex's nose brushes along Kara’s ear before she dips down to kiss the side of her neck. “Please, baby?” she murmurs into her skin.

Kara pulls Alex closer in response and holds on as tight as she can without causing harm. 

There’s already been enough of that.

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

**.**

"By the way, I'm still pretty pissed at you for not coming back sooner. What happened to 'I'll take care of you, Alex?', hm?"

"That's not fair, Alex, I told you why." 

"Yeah and I'm still upset about it. To make it up to me, you have to promise to hold me every night from now on and into the foreseeable future. Deal?"

"Ah, a noble sacrifice. Deal."

**x**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kara's processing.


End file.
